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Commentary:
"Meeting your older sister is like walking into a live-action reality show called 'Gray Hair Chronicles'! 🤣👵 Can't wait for the inevitable 'silver lining' jokes she's got up her sleeve! 💁‍♀️✨"

aging, anticipation, family, gray, gray hair, hair, humor, i, older, point, rivalry, sibling, sibling rivalry, sister, wait

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

0

2 months ago

activity, compare, comparison, exercise, feels, fitness, fun, fun activity, great, humor, motivation, running
When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.

0

2 months ago

audience, bad, bad joke, comedy, follow, follow up, good, humor, i, joke, land, laughter, performance, punchline, realize, tell, timing, worse
Livin’ la vida vodka!

0

2 months ago

drink, fun, humor, lifestyle, party, vida, vodka
For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

0

3 weeks ago

again, am, exhaustion, humor, i, retired, retirement, tired, today, wondering, yes, yesterday
Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

0

2 months ago

block, dating, getting-to-know-you, humor, interaction, just, me, phase, relationship, sarcasm, skip, social, social interaction
I tried yoga once. I pulled a hamstring and my dignity.

0

2 months ago

dignity, exercise, fail, hamstring, humor, i, injury, once, tried, yoga

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on Instagram this month:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

19 shares on YouTube this month:

To all the people who ask singles why they are actually single: Please don’t. We have sworn an oath and are not allowed to tell you the secret of our success.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m writing a book of obitchuaries for all the people who are dead to me.

83 shares on Facebook this month:

Girls … I understood why they advise us to get married and have kids before 25. Because after that, our brain starts working, and the decision won’t seem so reasonable anymore.

88 shares on Discord this month:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

20 shares on TikTok this month:

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

82 shares on Threads this month:

My hobbies include using the TV as background noise while I scroll on my phone.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

Every family needs a delusional daughter who is ambitious about relieving all her family’s struggles solely by winning the lottery one day.

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My morning coffee makes me feel like I’ve got my shit together. I don’t, but it makes me feel like I do.

97 shares on Threads this month:

I love when the restaurant bathroom has different music playing than the restaurant. It’s like I’m going to Club Pee Pee.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Having siblings is so important because you learn the exact amount you can annoy someone before they try to physically kill you.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

I finally figured out my lifelong dream of becoming a human blanket, but my friends still call it napping on their couch.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

My favorite color is money.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has downloaded:

Having someone sing you to sleep is so comforting, until you realize you are the only one in the room.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Elsa froze her entire kingdom instead of dealing with her feelings. I respect that level of avoidance.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

My superpower is wasting time I don’t even have.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Extroverts love our energy. That’s why they suck it out of us.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

“Jump to Recipe” is the closest we’ll ever get to teleportation.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

My husband has reached an age where he reads the menu out loud. The whole menu. And then he has questions. Please send help.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

Going viral on WeChat:

Have you tried complaining about it?

Going viral on Twitch:

Do you ever want sleep but sleep doesn’t want you?

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Onesies are amazing till you have to really pee in the middle of the night then you question all your life’s decisions.

Just shared via WeChat:

If A-B-C-D didn’t take their sweet time in the alphabet song, LMNOP wouldn’t have to sprint every time.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

Seen just now on Telegram:

No one knows what I’m up to, not even me.

Shared recently on Discord:

“I’m pretty good with money unless I leave my house or have access to the internet.”

Spotted on Facebook:

I forgot how to panic. Help!

Breaking via LinkedIn:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I can’t wait to see my older sister so she can point out I have more gray hair than she does.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.

Livin’ la vida vodka!

For all those wondering, yes, I am retired. I was tired yesterday, and I am tired again today.

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

I tried yoga once. I pulled a hamstring and my dignity.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨