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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

I hate to break it to you, guys, but my husband says you’re not real. He just called you my imaginary friends.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Some things are better left unsaid, unless you’re on X.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a lying weirdo.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

Strangers vomiting their beliefs all over you every day is not good for the soul.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has downloaded:

I ran out of toilet paper so I had to start using old newspapers. The Times are rough.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

Sorry you thought I I was flirting with you; I had something in my eye.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

Petition to add fitted sheet folding to the olympics.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

The main reason I got divorced was cause I got married.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here trying to remember how to spell “definitely”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,352

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via LinkedIn:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Just shared via Pinterest:

Are you the sun? Because you need to stay about 92,960,000 miles away from me.

Just shared via Snapchat:

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

Just landed via Facebook:

I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day.

Going viral on X:

There are too many neglected emojis.

Going viral on Instagram:

I like to be alone a lot; it’s nothing personal.

Going bananas on Threads:

Twitter is a prime example why most of us shouldn’t be left unsupervised.

Spotted on Facebook:

I use karate strictly as a last resort, after I’ve exhausted fleeing and screaming.

Just shared via WeChat:

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Some people pack their lives so full of activities, appointments and people that I get exhausted just reading about it.

I refuse to listen to anyone give commentary on the state of society unless it’s in a TikTok video filmed inside their car.

1 month ago

Humorous quote about society commentary limited to TikTok car videos, playful and witty.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, so you only accept societal insights if they come with a side of car karaoke vibes? 🚗🎤 Well, I guess that’s one way to take in the latest trends in between red lights and pit stops! Who knew the key to unraveling the mysteries of society lay in the backseat cupholder all along? 🤔📱 #CarConfessions

car, commentary, culture, give, humor, i, inside, listen, media, modern, modern culture, refuse, satire, social, social media, society, state, TikTok, trends, video

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m only staying up until midnight on New Year’s to watch that bloody year die.

37 shares on Instagram this month:

My signature move is always learning my lessons the hard way.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

96 shares on X this month:

Currently helping my nephew look for his M&M’s that I ate yesterday.

97 shares on Instagram this month:

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

34 shares on Telegram this month:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

31 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My shadow quit because I’m too boring.

57 shares on Reddit this month:

My ducks may not be in a row, but at least they’re having fun. Your ducks probably hate you for making them line up like that.

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Taking a sip of beer and letting out a big “ahhhh” so the pregnant lady at the pool next to me knows what she’s missing.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

You should be allowed to call out of work if you have a really bad nightmare.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If you inject Botox into a raisin, does it turn back into a grape?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Turns out my superpower is the ability to go into incredible detail in completely the wrong direction.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

All this overthinking, and I still make the worst decisions.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Weirdos gonna weird.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Spring is what we call the time in between complaining about the cold and complaining about the heat.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,436

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here hating myself.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Facebook friends are like pens. You may have 150, but only 5 are writing.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

I love when men remind me I’m evil because sometimes I be thinking I’m losing my spark.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

My brain says “Let’s do something exciting today” but my body says “Don’t listen to that fool.”

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Life is really sucking the life out of me.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

That awkward moment when a zombie looking for brains walks right past you.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Starting an OnlyFans, but it’s just videos of me trying to use chopsticks.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Having children is a pyramid scheme.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

An agenda reveal party, where I surprise everyone with all the things I hope to accomplish this weekend.

Going viral on Instagram:

I was not made for a 9 to 5; I was made to eat pasta and lay in the sun like a lizard.

Making waves on Reddit:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

Just shared via YouTube:

You can tell a group isn’t gonna make it big just by their name.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Girls will be like, “This is my comfort song,” and it’s the howling of a wolf inside a dark forest.

Going viral on Reddit:

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My life changed when I learned some house spiders can’t survive outside, so now I just catch them and release them in a friend’s home.

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