31 funny state quotes - Wordgag

You can really tell somebody’s mental state by they hair.

May 24, 2026

The single star on Texas’ flag is actually a review.

May 23, 2026

My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

May 23, 2026

I refuse to listen to anyone give commentary on the state of society unless it’s in a TikTok video filmed inside their car.

May 23, 2026

Twitter is the only place you argue with CEOs and heads of states while sleeping in the kitchen.

May 23, 2026

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

May 23, 2026

Almost fell asleep while putting on the sweater because it got dark for a moment. That’s all you need to know about my morning state.

May 22, 2026

I just finally discovered what’s wrong with my brain: on the left side there is nothing right and on the right side, there is nothing left.

May 20, 2026

A haunted house, but it’s just you inside your own head.

May 20, 2026

Mental state: just googled “When will the sun explode.”

May 19, 2026

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

May 19, 2026

I’m still repaying karmic debt from that time I was 12 and gave the middle finger to a cow at the state fair.

Apr 1, 2026

What’s it called when you mentally want to be horny but you’re physically not at all?

Apr 1, 2026

“Unavailable” is my favorite state to be in.

Apr 1, 2026

If you can figure out how to configure your default state to be slightly amused rather than slightly annoyed, you pretty much enter God Mode.

Mar 31, 2026

Social media is mental suicide.

Mar 31, 2026

(Most depressed guy you’ve ever met) I’m doing pretty good.

Mar 31, 2026

Mentally, I’m in a forest screaming. Physically, I’m answering emails with a fake smile and clenched jaw.

Mar 31, 2026

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Mar 30, 2026

The amount of inappropriate thoughts I have is a little concerning.

Mar 30, 2026

I’ve surpassed the need for coffee, for I have evolved into a higher state of awesome.

Mar 30, 2026

People who listen to their sad playlist when they’re happy are a different breed of unstable.

Mar 30, 2026

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Mar 30, 2026

Don’t think my brain is braining properly today.

Mar 30, 2026

Have you ever been so stressed that you’re calm?

Mar 30, 2026

So glad that the dream I had of you isn’t affecting me at all, and I’m able to go on with my day without thinking of it.

Mar 29, 2026

If Pokémon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

Mar 29, 2026

My brain is on airplane mode today.

Mar 29, 2026

Sometimes, I feel like my brain is still running on Windows 95.

Mar 29, 2026

Sorry about my behavior as of late. I have plastic in my brain.

Mar 28, 2026

Current state of politics: The circus is on fire but the monkey is fine.

Mar 28, 2026