Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

You honestly gotta believe in yourself so much that it’s borderline delusional.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

But babe, that’s my emotional support Lord of the Rings Extended Edition.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

If an alien is 60 million light years away and is watching us through a telescope, it will see dinosaurs.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

How is this the same brain that used to remember everybody’s phone numbers?

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Don’t forget, you are someone’s weird colleague.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

Brussels sprouts were invented by big cabbage to sell little cabbages.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,668

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

I knew I had issues when motivational speakers started to irritate me.

Going viral on Reddit:

Ghosting is disrespectful unless it’s me doing it.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

It’s weird how horses can run so fast but still suck at every other sport.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

The most important meal of the day is the next one.

Making waves on Threads:

I’m a people pleaser, unless you don’t like that. Then I’m not.

Trending via Snapchat:

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.

Spotted on Pinterest:

All these deadlines, but it’s you I want to meet.

Going viral on Facebook:

When I said there’s no such thing as a dumb question, I didn’t expect them to take it as a personal challenge.

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

3 weeks ago

Humorous text imagining planes with bird-like flapping wings for fun.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Flaplines: the only flight that comes with its own wind machine! ✈️🦅

airplane, aviation, bird, cooler, flight, flying, humor, i, think, whimsical, wings

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

3 weeks ago

beautiful, blowing, call, humor, phone, severe, severe thunderstorm warning, thunderstorm, warning, woman, women
Welcome to your 40’s: it’s ten years of people saying “wait until you’re 50”.

4 weeks ago

40s, 50, aging, expectation, humor, life, people, saying, ten, wait, welcome, year’s
How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

1 month ago

dip, early, exit, exit strategy, food, gracefully, humor, i, leave, leave early, me, party, queso, queso dip, situation, social, social situation, strategy, take
Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

3 weeks ago

20, again, age, birthday, humor, i, know, nostalgia, reflection, regret, time, wisdom, youth
Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

3 weeks ago

age, age humor, aging, body, bones, humor, joke, me, perspective, self-deprecating, still, young, youth
The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

1 month ago

animal, conspiracy, coo, government, humor, overthrow, pigeon, plot, plotting, satire, start

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on Facebook this month:

I never judge a book by its cover. People, though, I can tell are evil by their stupid faces.

77 shares on Facebook this month:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

92 shares on Threads this month:

I just looked over at my new shoes and the box says “vegan”. I’ve never had to feed my other shoes before.

10 shares on Messenger this month:

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

33 shares on LinkedIn this month:

SEO experts be like: I was eating a banana when my traffic increased, so bananas are definitely a ranking factor.

14 shares on YouTube this month:

Oh, you like NYC? Name every rat.

66 shares on Messenger this month:

“What’s your 5-year plan?” I’ll probably go to the movies next week, I think.

43 shares on Facebook this month:

The problem is I am always the problem.

57 shares on Threads this month:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

22 shares on Threads this month:

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

“I’ve been fantasizing about going back to bed since I woke up this morning.”

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Quitting a job is not enough. I need them to go out of business when I leave.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Can you put some pants on my voodoo doll and pop some money in the pocket, please?

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Oh, to live in simpler times, when there was nothing to do but sit by the seashore and contemplate the miracle of existence.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I’m so single. When they ask me for an emergency contact, I put the neighbor’s dog.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has bookmarked:

I poked your tweet with a stick, hoping it would do something.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

How was the word “Wife” invented? They took the first two and last two letters of wildlife.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Jan 1st: Avocado on whole grain toast with a protein shake. Jan 20th: Syrup comes from a tree so technically it’s a vegetable.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

I think my soulmate might be carbs.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

I’ve calculated my December budget and realized I can only afford to pray.

Just landed via Snapchat:

If you ever need nothing, I’m here for you.

Spotted on YouTube:

Old age is always 15 years older than I am.

Trending via Discord:

“There’s a particular type of insufferability that rich people from poor countries have, that I don’t yet fully know how to verbalize.”

Going viral on X:

Nice tweets, bro. What medications are you on?

Making waves on Reddit:

Turns out my superpower is the ability to go into incredible detail in completely the wrong direction.

Trending via Threads:

Sorry if I seem sad, I got a new long-sleeve shirt for fall, but I haven’t been able to wear it yet because it’s 94°.

Going viral on Facebook:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

Shared recently on TikTok:

“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”

Spotted on Slack:

Yes, I was behind the DJ booth, but only as a cultural anthropologist.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I think airplanes would be way cooler if the wings flapped like a bird.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Welcome to your 40’s: it’s ten years of people saying “wait until you’re 50”.

How do I gracefully leave this party early but also take the queso dip with me?

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Me: “I’m still young.” My bones: “No, we not.”

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨