I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Every time you break spaghetti noodles in half, an Italian has a stroke.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

I wonder if this is all happening because I opened that umbrella inside.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

It’s so cool when people who write for a living admit that they don’t read books or have thoughts.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

“You’re a psychopath!” At least I’m on a path, babe, sort your life out.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

There are two types of people in politics. Avoid them.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I logged on to Amazon and they said that they have run out of things that I don’t need.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Laundry has to be the most sinister chore. Always waiting, always lurking.