If I ever die on some hill, rest assured, something fishy is going on.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Nothing humbles you faster than your phone slipping out of your hand and hitting your face.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I now feel I’ve watched enough reruns of The Shawshank Redemption on basic cable that I’ll be able to successfully make it in prison.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Remember when you could lay in one position for hours, now you have to rotate like a rotisserie chicken every 15 minutes or a hip hurts.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

People don’t realize how hard you ride for them until you park.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

If you can’t handle me while I’m broke, then you don’t deserve me when I have $600.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

I successfully avoided the red-eye flight and got the much milder pink eye flight.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

ChatGPT’s primary use is to generate plausible excuses to leave dinner at the in-laws’.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Gonna start an app for cat sitters where they can review the cats they take care of and it’ll be called Litterboxd.