Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Ah, the invisible force field of personal space in the check out line! 🙅‍♂️🛒 Just remember, if you cozy up too close, you might end up involuntarily sponsoring someone's grocery run! 😂💸 #NeedMySpace

awkward, awkward situation, breathing, check, checkout, checkout line, close, humor, interaction, line, me, neck, pay, personal, personal space, sarcasm, shopping, situation, social, social interaction, space, stand, stuff, too, well

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

0

2 months ago

again, clutter, digital, digital clutter, humor, i, irony, memory, need, never, organization, procrastination, screenshot, swear, talent, technology
The new generation will never know what heartbreak feels like with wired headphones that have a loose connection.

0

2 months ago

connection, generation, headphone, headphones, heartbreak, know, loose, loose connection, music, never, new, nostalgia, relationship, technology, wired, wired headphone
The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

0

2 months ago

agony, around, chore, cleaning, dish, dishes, doing, domestic, finished, frustration, horror, household, humor, kitchen, only, pot, relatable, surprise, thinking, turn
To avoid burnout at work, use the 30-30 rule: after 30 minutes of work, quit your job and disappear into the mountains for 30 years.

0

2 months ago

30, 30-30, 30-30 rule, after, avoid, balance, burnout, disappear, escape, humor, job, minutes, mountain, quit, relief, retirement, rule, stress, stress relief, work, work life, work-life balance
My plan is to die young as late as possible.

0

2 months ago

dark, dark humor, death, die, humor, humor statement, late, life, longevity, philosophy, plan, statement, wit, young
I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

0

2 months ago

getting, humor, i, life, motivation, procrastination, self-improvement, shit, stress, together

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

27 shares on Instagram this month:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

My computer: Consider changing your password. Me: Consider fighting me in the streets.

78 shares on Telegram this month:

My Mom say that everyone has a beautiful side, so I guess I’m a circle.

16 shares on X this month:

You’d think, with the amount of overthinking I do, I’d make the right decision.

96 shares on Discord this month:

No, I won’t be attending your seance, I barely want to talk to the living.

68 shares on Reddit this month:

The introverted urge to spend a week alone at home after many holidays and family gatherings.

74 shares on X this month:

Nobody talks about the privilege of having a friend who shows interest in your hyperfixations.

56 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I have officially reached the age where I am bothered by lights being on, doors left open, loud noises, and people.

98 shares on Reddit this month:

Is stir-fry the only dish where the instructions are in the name?

55 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m not here to offend anyone; I’m here to offend everyone.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

We really grew up in the best era to be a kid, and the worst era to be an adult.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

I can’t decide if people who wear pajamas in public have given up on life, or they are living it to the fullest.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

I remember when Britain used to be so rich, you’d be embarrassed to go into a Lidl or Aldi.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has shared:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Someone from 🇪🇬 has viewed:

I need to consult the woods about this.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

Am I just getting older, or are people getting more annoying?

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Weird how I can’t seem to reach anything at the grocery store when hot men are around.

Trending via YouTube:

Microsoft: Before you sign in, we need to send you a code. Also, Microsoft: OMG, was that you that requested a code? Also, Microsoft: OMG, someone just signed in to your account.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Swimming is so embarrassing, everyone can see you want to be alive.

Trending via Facebook:

I hate it when I’m singing a song and the artist gets the words wrong.

Going viral on Snapchat:

You can chill with someone a whole day at the university, and never see them again in your life, lol.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Dinosaurs never had coffee, and we see how that turned out.

Just shared via Slack:

I hope this email makes you quit your job.

Just shared via YouTube:

At first, big breasts were attractive, then suddenly it was big butts. I’m waiting for it to finally be big bellies.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Alexa, take responsibility for my actions.

Broadcasted on Slack:

There are two quantities of popcorn: not enough and what have I done

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If you stand too close to me in the check out line, you may as well pay for my stuff while you’re breathing down my neck.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

The new generation will never know what heartbreak feels like with wired headphones that have a loose connection.

The agony of thinking you’re finished doing the dishes, only to turn around and, to your horror, the pot.

To avoid burnout at work, use the 30-30 rule: after 30 minutes of work, quit your job and disappear into the mountains for 30 years.

My plan is to die young as late as possible.

I’ve been so stressed about getting my shit together that I haven’t gotten any of my shit together.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨