Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Choo choo, all aboard the Dysfunction Express! 🚂😆 Don't worry folks, this train wreck comes with a complimentary smile for your viewing pleasure! 😜🚆 Brace yourselves for a bumpy ride!

chaos, dysfunctional, humor, just, life, life struggles, positivity, self-deprecation, smile, struggles, train, train wreck, wreck

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Why do we say ‘slept like a baby’? Babies wake up every two hours crying. I want to sleep like my cat—14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

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3 months ago

animal, animal behavior, baby, behavior, cat, crying, every, hours, humor, i, nap, regret, regrets, responsibility, say, sleep, tiredness, wake, want, why, zero
Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

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2 months ago

emotion, everyday, everyday life, feeling, frustration, humor, i, life, relatable, time, ugh
It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

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2 months ago

another, back, coming, frustration, humor, keeps, mad, return, storm, thing, weather, winter, yelling
“Why do I feel like shit all the time?” I ask myself, while staring into the flashlight that tells me bad news.

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2 months ago

ask, bad, bad news, feel, feeling, feeling bad, flashlight, health, humor, i, introspection, me, mood, myself, news, question, sarcastic, self-reflection, shit, staring, time, while, why
Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

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2 months ago

experience, good, money, music, never, pain, pocket, song, spending, youth
“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

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2 months ago

appearance, compliment, funny observation, humor, observation, sarcasm, sun, swimming, translation, volcano

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

49 shares on Threads this month:

What are cats even trying to do?

87 shares on Discord this month:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew I would be fraught with melancholy and nostalgia.

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Today I learned that up to half of the worker ants in a colony are only pretending to work, just looking busy so they don’t get tasked with anything. I respect ants so much more.

100 shares on YouTube this month:

My childhood led me to believe that as an adult I’d have to contend with truth serum, lava, quicksand, trap doors, and secret passageways. So far it’s mostly been weight gain and existential dread.

97 shares on Twitch this month:

If I’m ever murdered, feel comfort in knowing I ran my mouth until the bitter end.

99 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Make your salad taste better by putting it between bread, meat, cheese, and Big Mac sauce.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

Eat whatever you want. If someone calls you fat, eat them too.

10 shares on WeChat this month:

Honestly, will never top the year I told everyone I was going to be Amelia Earhart for Halloween, and then didn’t show up to the party.

49 shares on Telegram this month:

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

55 shares on YouTube this month:

During winter, it’s either lazy starvation or eight thousand calories in one sitting.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Once I matched with a guy and ended up finding out he lived in my neighborhood, so I told him to go outside and scream, and he did. And I heard it.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

If she wants the moon, you get her the moon.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

My anti-theft device in my car is that it’s manual.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Shit posting is cheaper than therapy.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Hugging helps break the tension with strangers in elevators.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Sugar held my hand through every breakup.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

And for my next trick, I’m going to make this first date the last date.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

The cheapest way to fly is off the handle.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Twitch:

I avoid those club cameras like my life depends on it.

Shared recently on X:

I love Queen and David Bowie, but why did they steal that riff from Vanilla Ice?

Going viral on Facebook:

They should have made a pool raft that looked like a broken door when Titanic was in theaters. I bet it would have sold millions.

Going viral on TikTok:

Seeing a grown man stumble when the train moves is disgusting. How will you provide for anyone?

Just landed via TikTok:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

Spotted on Twitch:

The class: “You want us to do what?” Super Mario: “Jump around, catch and eat the giant mushroom, bang your head against the crates and, if necessary, crush all the critters. It’sa easy!”

Live now on Reddit:

70% of the planet is covered in water, yet here I am drowning in bullshit.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

If a zombie and vampire bite each other, who turns who?

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m just another dysfunctional train wreck barreling down the tracks with a smile.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Why do we say ‘slept like a baby’? Babies wake up every two hours crying. I want to sleep like my cat—14 hours, no responsibilities, zero regrets.

Is ‘ugh’ an emotion? Because I fell it all the time.

It’s like winter is mad and keeps storming out, then coming back yelling ‘and another thing!’

“Why do I feel like shit all the time?” I ask myself, while staring into the flashlight that tells me bad news.

Today’s youth will never experience the pain of spending all their pocket money on a music album. Because of ONE good song!

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨