I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has bookmarked:

What if you went to ET’s planet and all of the other ET’s were wearing clothes?

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Pursuing an academic career is like thinking the stripper loves you.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

I hate when the lotion bottle pump squirts the hardened remains of its mucus plug into the palm of your hand.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

If someone drunk texts you, appreciate it. They’ve thought of you when they can barely think straight.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

I’ve reached the age where my train of thought often leaves the station without me.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

You lose some, you lose some more.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

I cheat on my taxes by sleeping with other people’s taxes.