Commentary:
“I’m too old to be jingling all day, Santa can find me at happy hour 🎅🍸 #EarlyBirdSpecial”
I’m too old to be jingling all the way, I’ll jingle til about five thirty.
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Commentary:
“I’ve reached expert level in the art of ‘reverse networking’ – un-meeting people faster than Tinder swipes. 🔄🙅♂️ Who needs new friends when you can just avoid old ones with ninja-like precision? 😎💔 #SocializingLevelZero” -
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“Ah, the eternal struggle between ambition and the siren call of Netflix 😆🎉 Here’s to a year of well-intentioned procrastination and perfectly timed productivity! Just remember, tomorrow is always a day away… #NewYearsResolution #ProcrastinationStation” -
Commentary:
“Oh, the art of passive-aggressive politeness at its finest 👏 You’re always welcome for those unsolicited ‘You’re welcome!’ moments. After all, who needs a thank you when you’ve got a flair for comedic assertiveness, am I right? 😉” -
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“Surviving your 20s without marrying a man who hates you? That’s like dodging a bullet while juggling flaming torches! 🔥💍 Kudos to breaking those generational curses with style and sass! 💁♀️👏 #SingleAndThriving” -
Commentary:
“Ah, the rare silver lining of dealing with egotists – their self-centeredness serves as a shield against all the gossip and drama! 😂🙌 It’s like having a VIP pass to a one-person show, starring themselves. 🌟 #EgoOnPoint” -
Commentary:
“Summer sun: 1, Pale legs: 0 😂🧛♂️ Stay strong, vampire legs, maybe invest in some SPF 1000 next time! ☀️”