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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

That “so we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

I hope this email finds you in a well.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

Calling ahead to the cafe to warn them to “get those beans brewing”.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Friday the 13th doesn’t even feel creepy cause bad things happen everyday now.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

You’re either really good at wrapping presents or you’re really beautiful and funny. It’s one or the other.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

Waffles are just pancakes with convenient boxes to hold your syrup.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

Updated

25 minutes ago

Users Online

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

My coffee and I used to be hot. Now, we’re just bitter.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Weekends are a scam, you spend one day exhausted and the other day anxious. Like, what the hell was that?

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Making waves on Slack:

If your god commands you to kill others, find another god.

Making waves on X:

Looks like it’s just you and me tonight, family size Toblerone.

Shared recently on Threads:

I used to have a great future in my past.

Spotted on Instagram:

Still can’t believe America has a federal holiday to celebrate the hit movie Independence Day.

Breaking via WeChat:

My wife is refusing to bring me a beer. That’s it, gonna text her and say “I cannot believe how lazy you are”.

Just landed via YouTube:

I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh dear, it seems your shenanigan quota is running dangerously low! 🙊 Time to dust off the ol' mischief manual and get back in the game before you become too serious for your own good! 🎉 Remember, life is more fun with a dash of chaos and a sprinkle of silliness! 😉 Let the shenanigans commence!

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

Updated

25 minutes ago

Users Online

3,436

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

Imagine you get to the gates of heaven and they make you download an app to go in.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

We live in a time where intelligent people are being silenced, so that stupid people won’t be offended.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

You can name literally any food or drink to the dentist and they’ll be like “ohhh, that’s actually so bad for your teeth. You should only eat water and toothpaste.”

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

The final stage of being single is when you listen to a love song and no one comes to mind; at that point, you’ve achieved absolute singularity.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Being too stressed isn’t good for the baby. I’m not pregnant though, it’s just that I’m the baby.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Croutons feel like an apology. “Sorry we gave you salad. Have some consolation toast.”

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

You don’t need fun to have alcohol.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

Nothing bores me like twins who don’t look alike, you should’ve just dropped later if you’re not going to participate.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Therapy is cool but singing as loud as you can in your car is free.

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on TikTok:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Reported on Snapchat:

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I logged on to Amazon and they said that they have run out of things that I don’t need.

Trending via Twitch:

Are you my pinky toe, because I will bang you on all my furniture.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Expiration date? More like spoiler alert.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

This meeting could have been an AI summary.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I’m a little too self-aware to enjoy life, and a little too delusional to give up.

Just landed via Reddit:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I like my Jims slim and my chances fat.

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