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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness, clearly never paid for a divorce.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

I kind of enjoy living in a world where I can end a conversation by simply not texting back.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

The knife is my brush, the jam my paint and the toast my canvas.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

I’m sorry, being on social media gave you the impression I’m a social person.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

At the dispensary asking which strain will stop the yearning.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Whoever told you there’s no such thing as a stupid question lied.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

Today’s politics make me think we’re living in a movie where the villains actually win.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

The art of today’s art is to persuade people that it’s art.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

Salt is just angry sugar.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I’m really looking forward to eight hours of thinking about sleep tonight.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2305 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,467

Funny Quotes Topics

15,179

Funny Quotes Images

12,467

57 minutes ago

3,432

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

A marriage is about solving problems together, you know, those problems you wouldn’t have if you were single.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“Dairy Queen” is actually the perfect drag name.

Shared recently on Twitch:

I’m at the age where I won’t make eye contact with someone because they look like a “talker.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

Trending via Telegram:

That moment the doorbell rings and you tip toe to the window pretending you’re not home.

Broadcasted on Discord:

Imagine if every time you ate a grape you’d hear a soft voice whisper “that was my son…”

Just landed via Messenger:

Two words have helped me open a lot of doors in my life. Push and Pull.

Making waves on Instagram:

Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

Spotted on Threads:

Every time you rub your eyes, they should change color a little.

Live now on Discord:

Telling your parents about your problems is like trying to put out a fire with gasoline.

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

6 months ago

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

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Commentary:
Ah, the good ol' days of spreading rumors like the town crier of misinformation! 🗣️🤥 Kids today have it so simple with just a few clicks to spread rumors faster than wildfire. 🔥 Let's hope they also inherit the responsibility to fact-check before hitting that share button! 🕵️‍♂️ #ThrowbackThursday #TechyTimes

bad, bad situation, growing, growing up, humor, i, interaction, kids, misinformation, much, nostalgia, outdoors, outside, person, personal, personal interaction, situation, something, spread, today

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2305 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,467

Funny Quotes Topics

15,179

Funny Quotes Images

12,467

57 minutes ago

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

This summer I’m going cicada mode: emerging briefly from my house and being really loud until I find a mate.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

I’d like to meet the person who decided that if you wanted to get married fast, it had to be done by Elvis.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

What do you call it when everything pisses you off but you’re good at not murdering people?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I bet once Bigfoot tries cheeseburgers, he’s gonna wanna hangout with us all the time.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

I’m going to be real pissed if I get my shit together and the world ends.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has shared:

Robots eating a bowl of cereal that’s actually a bunch of nuts and bolts, you don’t see that as much anymore.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Threatening my husband with tariffs every time he tries to make me watch sports on TV.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I thought my wrinkles were finally getting smaller, but it turns out my eyes were just getting worse.

Going viral on YouTube:

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Breaking via Snapchat:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Going viral on YouTube:

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

Going viral on Twitch:

Do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

Shared recently on TikTok:

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

When you want to key his car, but he doesn’t have one, so you bend his bus pass.

Seen just now on X:

Remember you are dust and, after you send this email, to dust you shall return.

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