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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has copied:

If people love cheese so much, why are they mad when someone smells like cheese.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Foolproof? Yeah, well we’ll see about that.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has copied:

Hungry me has no respect for bathroom scale me.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has bookmarked:

Everyone is getting pregnant or married, and I’m back to “What’s your favorite color?“

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

Babe, are you OK? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has copied:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

There’s something so spiritual about new life. When I look my baby nephew in the eyes, I can’t stop thinking about how amazing it will be to connect with him on LinkedIn.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,623

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

Before we become friends, could you please sign this NDA.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn’t be allowed to talk.

Going viral on TikTok:

It’s the perfect time of year to focus on my indoor hobbies, like lying down in a dark room and feeling insane.

Making waves on Facebook:

That uncle who kept his distance from the rest of the family will start making more sense to you as you get older.

Trending via Snapchat:

Whenever I’m with real yappers, I realize I might actually be a listener.

Just shared via YouTube:

No one warned me that being an adult was mostly just hurrying up to get somewhere you don’t want to go in the first place.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Please don’t take illegal substances. Or at least, don’t take MY illegal substances.

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

2 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Why do battles always happen at bedtime? 🛌💥🧠🤯

anxiety, bed, going, laying, nervous, nervous system, sleeplessness, someone, stress, system, tension, war

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

1 month ago
always, book, cleverness, dog, dog ear, ear, facade, humor, irony, keep, know, literary, nightstand, people, perception, read, reading, think
If you get injured playing peekaboo, you end up in the ICU.

1 month ago
end, game, humor, ICU, injured, injury, peekaboo, play, playing
My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

2 months ago
context, enjoyment, good, humor, listen, listening, music, neighbors
Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

1 month ago
diary, even, going, humor, i, mad, media, post, privacy, reading, social, social media, stuff, things, Twitter
When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

1 month ago
admiration, cup, drink, fruit, fruit tea, healthy, healthy lifestyle, humor, lifestyle, looks, red, tea, wine
When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

1 month ago
cake, chocolate, coping, coping mechanism, cream, dessert, eat, humor, ice, ice cream, mechanism, stress, sweet, wordplay

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

If she tells you, she’s got a man, keep trying. Loyal women don’t even reply.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

I have tasted academic validation. I have tasted romantic love. I recommend getting a hobby.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

I think it is mandatory, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I tried meowing back at the cat to show him I was making an effort, but he just switched to English.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Facebook:

90% of parenting is wondering when you can lie down again.

Making waves on Discord:

“Ooh, you’ve caught the sun.” Translation: You look like you’ve been swimming in a volcano.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I don’t know why hair extensions are exclusive to women, I want to look like a centaur.

Making waves on X:

Sex is cool and all, but have you ever tried obsessing over a mediocre person who’s just not that into you.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Shared recently on WeChat:

A moment of silence for the paycheck that was in my account for five minutes.

Just landed via Instagram:

Had a fight with an erection this morning. Beat it single-handed.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

If you get injured playing peekaboo, you end up in the ICU.

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Drinking a beer alone with terrible posture.

The cool thing about being a procrastinator is, really bad ideas also don’t ever make it off the ground.

I am cassette tape years old.

When I die, I want to come back as a speed bump so I can piss people off.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

Please text me back. I’m about to start making stuff up in my head, and the stuff is all bad.

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

IP address? You mean the bathroom?

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

The bank just called and gave me the biggest compliment, said my balance is outstanding. I really needed that today.

I figured out how they built the pyramids. No internet.

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

When you’re a snowman, everything smells like a carrot.

The key to looking amazing is looking like shit most of the time, so it’s more of a surprise.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

First date idea: Couples Colonoscopies.

Are you bad wifi, cause im feeling no connection here.

I tried to embrace my flaws. They filed a restraining order.

Life is short. Make sure you spend as much time as possible on the web arguing with strangers.

I love when lashes make me look evil.

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Laying in bed with the nervous system of someone going to war.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

If you get injured playing peekaboo, you end up in the ICU.

My neighbors listen to really good music, whether they like it or not.

Twitter actually is my diary, so you’re not allowed to get mad at the things I post. You’re not even supposed to be reading this. Why were you going through my stuff?

When you drink red wine from a cup, it looks like fruit tea and you are also admired by others for your healthy lifestyle.

When you are stressed you eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets, because stressed spelled backwards is desserts.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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