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Commentary:
"Life hack: Solving the awkward small talk dilemma one cozy day at a time 🏡 Just add pajamas and Netflix for maximum avoidance success! 💁‍♂️ #HomebodyWinning"

hack, house, leave, life, life hack, never, running, someone, talk, want, worry

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

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4 months ago

exercise, going, here, humor, i, just, mouth, procrastination, run, running, talking
He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

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2 months ago

$10, dating, humor, personality, relationship, traits, volume
I’m not sure how long my body can handle this “getting out of bed early in the morning” nonsense.

0

2 months ago

bed, body, early, getting, humor, morning, nonsense, struggle
Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

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2 months ago

busy, choices, dream, going, i, ignore, life, lot, priorities, right, stress, symbolic
Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

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2 months ago

audiobook, buy, humor, inquiry, know, question, reading, thanks, transcript
Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

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2 months ago

anxiety, anxious, day, exhausted, exhaustion, humor, irony, leisure, relaxation, scam, spend, stress, weekend

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on Discord this month:

The problem with hiding snacks from my kid is that when I forget, they end up being hidden from me too.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

My superpower is always picking the line at the grocery store that moves the slowest.

36 shares on X this month:

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

77 shares on Snapchat this month:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

68 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Bro, you’re not allowed anymore to have your tongue drop out of your mouth and form a stair case when you see my wife.

41 shares on WeChat this month:

The T in depression stands for the therapy places that are immediately available.

87 shares on Messenger this month:

Netflix has every movie except the one you want to watch.

38 shares on Instagram this month:

I need to stop living by the words “life is short.” It’s hurting my bank account.

82 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I just want peace, not a notification every time someone breathes.

87 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The moon is literally dragging the oceans around, and you think your body shouldn’t feel it?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Having a low-quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Whatever y’all heard about me, I’m way worse.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

They should invent a type of situation that improves.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has downloaded:

Which one of you shrunk all of my jeans?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

If the man is silent, he is a thinker. If the woman is silent, the thinker is in big trouble.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Why count sheep when I can count my troubles?

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

One person’s logic is another one’s “what the heck?”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Vibrators are wrong and unnatural. The Bible said Adam and Eve, not Florence and the Machine.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Just rolled over for a cuddle.. forgot I’m single… fell off the bed.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Discord:

All strapless bras need to be taken off the shelves. A total recall. We do not have the technology yet.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

All income is disposable if you’re brave enough.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Sorry I’m unavailable… the horrors of reality insist upon themselves.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Turning regret into ulcers since the day I was born.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Maybe your baby is crying because it doesn’t like you.

Just landed via YouTube:

Your suitcase just texted. It’s getting bored.

Going bananas on Slack:

Someone has left me a voicemail. I don’t know what to do. Open the phone app? The contacts? Do I turn on the TV?

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Cops wake up Christmas morning excited as hell to ignore their family and go sit on the highway with a radar gun for 10 hours.

Trending via Facebook:

One year closer to whatever age my obituary will say.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Life hack: If you never leave the house you don’t have to worry about running into someone you don’t want to talk to.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

I’m not sure how long my body can handle this “getting out of bed early in the morning” nonsense.

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨