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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

Now that I’m in my mid-forties, I think I’ll take up parkour.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I love how every website has a “Keep me signed in on this computer” button and it’s just straight up bullshit.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has viewed:

Being an adult is crazy. Because what the hell is going on?

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

The global energy crisis could be solved if only we could harness the power of my wife slamming my car door.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Blowing over it is also dusting.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Don’t invite me anywhere in the last minute. I enjoy doing nothing, so I need to know ahead of time if my plan to do nothing needs to be changed.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

782 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,944

Funny Quotes Topics

13,916

Funny Quotes Images

10,944

32 minutes ago

3,437

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

Live now on WeChat:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Being a goldfish must be brilliant. Every six seconds you’re pleasantly surprised to find that you live in a castle.

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m not a morning person. I’m not even an afternoon person. I pretty much start functioning after 6pm.

Spotted on Twitch:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’m already spoiled… please don’t come into my life trying to unspoil me.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Shoutout to coughing on the bus. Haven’t tried it myself but seems really popular.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

NFTs were less about the money and more about the friends you scammed along the way.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Life is like a helicopter. I don’t know how to operate a helicopter.

Shared recently on YouTube:

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

2 months ago

Life is just a series of Sopranos references with some other things mixed in.

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Commentary:
Ah, the sweet symphony of life—cue the bassline of Sopranos quotes, with a splash of everything else to keep it spicy! 🎶🍝 Sometimes I feel like I’m just one ambitious mob boss trying to locate the best coffee in New Jersey, all while reminiscing about "Forget about it" moments. ☕️🔫 Remember, in the opera of life, the theme music is mostly Sopranos, and the rest is just a dramatic monologue.

comedy, culture, entertainment, humor, just, life, mixed, pop, pop culture, references, satire, series, sery, Sopranos, things, TV, TV references

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

782 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,944

Funny Quotes Topics

13,916

Funny Quotes Images

10,944

32 minutes ago

3,450

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

They probably killed the first few people whose eyes turned red in a photograph before they realized it wasn’t any demon stuff.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Why, as a hair, would you even wanna be ingrown. Like why are you doing that?

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Siblings are proof you can love someone and also dislike them at the same time.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

“I asked ChatGPT”. I confided in Amazon. I confessed to McDonald’s. I have an inside joke with Exxon Mobil.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

They should invent a political party that doesn’t suck.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Every house is a dream house when you can’t afford one.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

If it turns cold one more time, I’m gonna put the Christmas tree back up.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Just heard my knee crack so loud I expected it to glow in the dark.

Going viral on Telegram:

Aliens are coming to Earth, people are going to the Moon, and I am still pushing on a door that says pull.

Breaking via WeChat:

Venmo is my favorite social media site. I love to see my boy John charge his wife for Martinis.

Just shared via YouTube:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Why is there so much day left at the end of my energy?

Spotted on X:

No show does a misunderstanding / miscommunication plot better than Modern Family does.

Spotted on WeChat:

I am the human version of tangled headphones.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Just landed via Discord:

I would prefer not to.

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