Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Meteorologists be like: 'Let's chat about the clouds when all we really wanna hear about is some killer asteroids! 🌦️☄️' Come on, weather folks, give us the celestial drama we signed up for!"

always, communication, ever, humor, irony, meteor, meteorologist, meteorologists, observation, talking, weather

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

0

2 months ago

frustration, hour, humor, meeting, motivation, player, sarcasm, team, team meeting, team player, workplace
Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

0

2 months ago

anything, chaos, family, full, house, humor, kids, live, parenting, people
Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

0

2 months ago

apples, bag, careful, fitness, grocery, heavy, humor, journey, just, market, me, relationship, update, wife
Notice how you don’t catch me in public, it’s because i’m not real.

0

2 months ago

catch, existence, humor, illusion, joke, me, notice, public, real, self-awareness
All quiet on the frontal lobe.

0

1 month ago

brain, frontal, frontal lobe, humor, lobe, pun, quiet
I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

0

2 months ago

benedict, breakfast, cooking, egg, eggs, Eggs Benedict, expensive, food, humor, i, just, kitchen, mistake, poach, tried, understand

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

81 shares on WeChat this month:

I am listening to Pharrell Williams’ smash hit song “Happy,” and understanding for the first time that it was truly intended to distress.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

Common sense is so rare these days that it should be considered a superpower.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

There are beautiful horny women (me) being forced into celibacy due to the utter lack of worthy men in existence. This is the world we are living in now.

57 shares on Snapchat this month:

Finally got around to emptying the vegetable drawer of the fridge before something started its independence movement in there.

17 shares on Instagram this month:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

82 shares on X this month:

It’s important to post stupid stuff so you can learn who likes you.

26 shares on Messenger this month:

Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

37 shares on Pinterest this month:

Hair is washed. I am finally lovable and capable of loving again.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Best friends should be able to apply to jobs together and get hired as a set.

95 shares on Twitch this month:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean it won’t be a good time.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has copied:

I followed my heart. It led me to the fridge.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

This meeting could have been a pajama party.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

I’m not tispy. I’m merry.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

There is no actual wolf in Wolf of Wall Street.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

You look like the kind of person whose recorded calls have been used for training purposes.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

The world needs to chill out. There’s no way future history teachers can cram all this nonsense into a semester.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Kids these days don’t know the shame of having to explain yo-yo injuries.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

That urge to nap between 3pm – 5pm is no joke.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

By accepting their pardons, the turkeys are admitting guilt.

Live now on Threads:

Feeling lonely? Just glue a coffee cup to the roof of your car. Everyone will wave to you.

Just shared via YouTube:

Naps are tricky. Either you wake up relaxed and refreshed, or you have a headache, a dry throat and no idea what year it is.

Going viral on Instagram:

If there’s one thing we can trust, it’s billionaires.

Trending via Discord:

Getting real tired of my own bullshit.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’m no expert, but I don’t think the United Kingdom is very united.

Live now on X:

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

Breaking via Messenger:

“I’m so grateful that so many things are none of my business.”

Just shared via YouTube:

Plot twist: the universe is waiting for you to give it a sign.

Making waves on WeChat:

My swear jar is filing for an IPO soon.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Meteorologists are always talking about the weather and hardly ever about meteors.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

After an hour on this team meeting I’m not wanting to be a team player anymore.

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Notice how you don’t catch me in public, it’s because i’m not real.

All quiet on the frontal lobe.

I just tried to poach an egg and I now understand why Eggs Benedict is $23

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨