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Commentary:
"Meteorologists be like: 'Let's chat about the clouds when all we really wanna hear about is some killer asteroids! 🌦️☄️' Come on, weather folks, give us the celestial drama we signed up for!"

always, communication, ever, humor, irony, meteor, meteorologist, meteorologists, observation, talking, weather

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

0

2 months ago

bed, humor, i, laziness, morning, motivation, procrastination, relatable, wake, wake up, want
I am calling on public libraries to ban the books that I borrowed and lost. We don’t need that kind of crap in the libraries.

0

2 months ago

am, ban, books, borrow, calling, humor, i, irony, library, lost, need, public, reading
I told my daughter to check her attitude, and she responded, “For complaints about attitude, please contact the manufacturer.”

0

2 weeks ago

attitude, check, complaint, complaints, contact, daughter, humor, i, manufacturer, parent-child, please, response, told, witty, witty response
I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

0

2 months ago

abduction, alien, aliens, chores, clean, cleaning, eat, hands, humor, hygiene, i, me, mothership, parenting, room, vegetables, wash
We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

0

2 months ago

choice, decision, humor, options, perspective, simplicity, things, ways
Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

0

2 months ago

admire, driver, frustration, humor, irony, patience, perspective, road, something, traffic

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

78 shares on Messenger this month:

I was gonna brush up against you like a cat, but whatever, bro.

71 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I think my wife has got early Alzheimer’s. Every day she tells me that she has no idea what she first saw in me.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

And once again my day begins without a red carpet! Guys, I’m really disappointed in you.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Adulting is making a phone call, even though you don’t want to.

87 shares on TikTok this month:

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

50 shares on TikTok this month:

Sometimes I need a break from myself but it’s like, ugh, everywhere I go there I am.

54 shares on Slack this month:

Farmers markets should be for vegetables — not for millennials unloading their failed Etsy-store arts and crafts.

15 shares on Messenger this month:

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

24 shares on TikTok this month:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

80 shares on Telegram this month:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Spent most of the day making sure the couch still works. So far so good.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

20s: LOL! 30s: OMG! 40s: WTF!

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

An Advent Calendar for adults but behind every door is a different kind of anxiety medication.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

As a parent of a teenage daughter, I would like to formally apologize to my parents for my tube-top and low-rise jeans era.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

I love how all the movies about teenagers have to be set in the 90s or earlier otherwise we’d just be watching kids on their phones for two hours.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

All I know for sure is that I could be wrong.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Reading about two insects who fall in love in Italy. It’s a Rome ants novel.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

My favorite genre of tweet is conservative guy asking Grok, ‘Is this true?’ and then arguing with it when it doesn’t give him the answer he likes.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Please twerk; I have just days left.

Making waves on Facebook:

Sleep with each other, or someone else will!

Trending via TikTok:

I’ve reached a point in my life where if I can’t find parking, I’m just going to go home.

Going viral on Telegram:

Switching between brainrot and deep intellectual talks is a skill that only a few acquire.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Pretty girls don’t compete. We sit pretty, count blessings, and ignore weird energy.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I was living in the moment until I was evicted.

Shared recently on Threads:

How many of you also constantly take screenshots of something and then never look at them again?

Trending via Threads:

Haven’t seen a single bikini photoshoot in the snow this year; the girls are tired.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The lack of a pope has got me acting wild.

Just landed via Facebook:

I’m just a Whole Foods girl on a Walmart budget.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Meteorologists are always talking about the weather and hardly ever about meteors.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

I am calling on public libraries to ban the books that I borrowed and lost. We don’t need that kind of crap in the libraries.

I told my daughter to check her attitude, and she responded, “For complaints about attitude, please contact the manufacturer.”

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨