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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Can’t. Calling out some bullshitters on some bullshit.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Internet strangers offer the best advice.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Always keep a dog eared book on your nightstand so that people think you know how to read.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Pressure washing is like regular washing but with a lot of yelling and tight deadlines.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,950

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Telegram:

Still don’t understand how girls with no jobs be holding iPhones.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m in my 20s, but somehow I’m 16 and also 55 at the same time.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I’m not even doomscrolling anymore; I’m just regular scrolling, and everything’s doomed.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Spotted on Facebook:

Being skinny may be nice, but chicken nuggets are even nicer.

Live now on Slack:

Relationship status: you’d think something called a Roomba would be a better dancer.

Just shared via TikTok:

If you have an old house, but you haven’t got a ghost, you should complain to the estate agent.

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When mom goes full CIA on dust particles and socks, yet we're all suspects 🕵️‍♀️🧹🧦🔍

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The lion doesn’t concern himself with much of anything these days.

1 month ago
anything, apathy, attitude, carefree, concern, confidence, days, humor, lion, much, relaxation
Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

5 months ago
comparison, cooperation, fitted, fitted sheet, hard, humor, just, matter, never, relationship, sheet, try, woman, women
You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

1 month ago
DupliKate, humor, jokes, Kate, name, need, suggestion, twins, wordplay
Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

22 hours ago
adolescence, change, experience, growth, hair, humor, puberty
Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

1 month ago
arrested, chain, chain of command, charge, city, comedy, comedy idea, command, concept, funny concept, idea, leader, librarian, major, major city, people, person, running, sitcom, top, unexpected, unexpected leader, where
Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

1 month ago
bar, comfort, comfort food, eating, emotional, emotional support, food, humor, just, purse, self-care, snack, Snickers, support

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

I can always tell what part of my cycle I’m in by how concerned my friends are over my Tweets.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I don’t like people driving fast—that’s the reason why I overtake them.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

As everyone was arguing about politics, no one saw me leave with the cake.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Whoever has designed parking garages is either an architectural genius or an evil sadist.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Parents be like “Boys are easier,” and then their daughter has to save the family from ruin.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I’ll let you guys know if the psych ward has wifi.

Making waves on Telegram:

Oh, so ChatGPT is gonna tell me about me? Seems gossipy.

Trending via Instagram:

Whenever someone tells me how well behaved my kids are, I say it’s cause they’re not at home.

Going viral on TikTok:

“Thanks for your payment!” Shut up. I paid that bill against my will.

Making waves on Threads:

I miss when bills were none of my business.

Spotted on Telegram:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Going viral on YouTube:

I want the dreams to chase me for once.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

The lion doesn’t concern himself with much of anything these days.

Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

“You look tired”. No, I’m just ugly.

I’m at the age where I’m more likely to fall asleep at the movie theater than get frisky in one.

Picking up women at the bar and then gently setting them down.

Happy birthday to everyone, for the rest of your lives. I can’t do this anymore.

Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I need to have a ginger ale about this.

Iced coffee and crying, the most Californian afternoon.

Vaginally speaking, he seems nice.

Ever since I was a little girl, I have loved staying up really late, hanging out with myself, and thinking about stuff and things.

My mom be cutting up fruit and bringing it to me in my room without saying nothing. That’s when it hits me, nobody ever gonna love me this much.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I think Bigfoot had it right, stay in hiding from all the shitty human beings.

Relationship Status: just tried to pet my dog and he turned his head so I pretended I was reaching for a leaf that was next to him.

There’s endless songs out there about love and pain and life, but basically only one about the wheels on the bus. Just goes to show you they nailed it the first try.

I have a date and nothing to wear. Or as Nietzsche said: If you stare into a closet long enough, the closet stares back at you.

I’m not an idiot anymore, universe, please stop with the lessons.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Getting a second opinion about my Tamagotchi’s health.

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

Coming back to your own bed after a few days away is peak coziness.

Happiness is an inside job.

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Moms will vacuum the ceiling, alphabetize the spice rack, reorganize your socks, then say, “No one helps me around here!”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The lion doesn’t concern himself with much of anything these days.

Women are like a fitted sheet. No matter what you do or how hard you try, they just never seem to cooperate.

You need a twins name suggestion? How about Kate and DupliKate?

Puberty was a hair-raising experience.

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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