Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🤥 "Surprise! Your online friend might just be your real-life accountability buddy in disguise! 🕵️‍♂️ Just remember, even behind the screen, honesty is the best policy! 😉 #CaughtRedHanded"

account, actually, fake, humor, identity, joke, officer, probation, probation officer, relationship, surprise

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.

0

2 months ago

being, boss, expectations, hate, humor, i, means, news, reality, self-employed, terrible, work
Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

0

2 months ago

anger, better, cleaning, frustration, household, humor, motivation, nobody, pissed, productivity, someone
I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

0

2 months ago

accident, accidentally, background, digital, digital life, funny habit, habit, humor, i, least, life, once, phone, screenshot, take, tech, tech humor, week, weekly
Sounds like you are suffering from a lack of vitamin Me.

0

6 months ago

humor, joke, lack, me, pun, sarcasm, self, sounds, suffering, vitamin
I don’t wanna party like it’s 1999, I want to pay my bills like it’s 1999.

0

2 months ago

1999, bills, finances, humor, i, nostalgia, party, pay, responsibility, want
Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

0

2 months ago

admiration, beauty, best, gods, humor, nature, sunset, woman, women

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

86 shares on Threads this month:

God doesn’t do nearly enough smiting anymore.

57 shares on TikTok this month:

At least I’m part of the generation that at 30 still looks like it’s in its early 20s.

43 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Extroverts love our energy. That’s why they suck it out of us.

81 shares on LinkedIn this month:

There could be a ghost aggressively breakdancing beside you right now and you’d have no idea.

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

My talents include sneaking out of work early on a Friday.

91 shares on Telegram this month:

A foghorn but for people who can’t see through their own bullshit.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

72 shares on Threads this month:

After a quick review of my finances, everyone is going to have to be happy with a forehead kiss for Christmas.

73 shares on Instagram this month:

Asking Santa Claus for nudes.

27 shares on Facebook this month:

My company promotes diversity. We’d never hire twins.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Anyone who lives within their means suffers from a lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

I forgot to get milk, so Santa has a cup of Pepsi Max.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Whoever said money can’t buy happiness simply didn’t know where to go shopping.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

I’m a pocket full of sunshine, not your dumping ground for grumpiness.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Tornadoes are the most relaxing things in the news.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

It’s strange that watching paint dry is considered boring but going to an art gallery is considered interesting. That’s just watching paint that’s already dry.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

Breakfast in bed: cute in theory, gross in practice.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

People tell introverts to talk more and get out of their comfort zone, but no one tells extroverts to shut up to make the zone comfortable.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

My childhood led me to believe that as an adult I’d have to contend with truth serum, lava, quicksand, trap doors, and secret passageways. So far it’s mostly been weight gain and existential dread.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

Just landed via Pinterest:

What are cats even trying to do?

Spotted on Threads:

Imagine a refund on all the money you spent on alcohol.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Y’all shivering in this cold cause them Shein jackets made outta paper towels.

Just shared via Telegram:

I’m sorry if I seem weird, it’s because I am.

Just landed via TikTok:

Some of you aren’t reading the room. Not even listening to the room on audiobook.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

It’s wild that “Jason” is a name from ancient Greece, because it sounds like it was invented in Florida in 1983.

Making waves on Slack:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My account is fake, I’m actually your probation officer.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.

Nobody cleans better than someone who’s pissed off.

I accidentally take a screenshot of my phone background at least once a week.

Sounds like you are suffering from a lack of vitamin Me.

I don’t wanna party like it’s 1999, I want to pay my bills like it’s 1999.

Sunsets and women are undoubtedly God’s best creations.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨