My acting reel includes clips of me “listening” during Zoom meetings.

94 shares on Pinterest this month:

Billionaires didn’t get rich by working harder. They got rich by making sure you work harder, get paid less, and spend more.

58 shares on Messenger this month:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

I’m begging for a day to be added in between Saturday and Sunday.

50 shares on Instagram this month:

One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

30 shares on YouTube this month:

I just locked eyes with a spider. But instead of killing him I ran away and hid, so he can spend the night stressing about where I am.

98 shares on Instagram this month:

Sunrises are really beautiful, but the timing is rather bad.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

Having to pee really puts things into perspective. Like, OK, none of this matters.

69 shares on Messenger this month:

Fun prank: make people study for many years, and then don’t give them jobs.

83 shares on Threads this month:

I still can’t believe they named a company GoDaddy.

69 shares on Reddit this month:

Me to cat: quit looking at me like I’m an ingredient.