Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

At the end of the day, the day is going to end.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I’m not stubborn, my way is just better than yours.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

Perfume is key, but deodorant is keyer and showering is keyest.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

“I’m going to try underthinking about a situation, and see if that works.”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Yoga is just slow motion breakdancing.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

Someone you haven’t talked to in forever will show up in your dream just to do a backflip.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Getting excited to go to bed is a different level of adulting.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

Date idea: you tell me every thought you’ve ever had about me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,741

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Sorry, can’t. I’m too busy growing new neural pathways to make space for a stranger’s opinion. Evolution takes bandwidth, man.

Seen just now on Slack:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Wealthy person who has no problems and also meditates sometimes: Meditation is my secret weapon.

Going viral on Slack:

It’s almost time to pack away the black summer clothes and unpack the black winter clothes.

Just landed via Messenger:

Ain’t nothing better than knowing you were right when everyone else thought you were crazy.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Making waves on Facebook:

Three words no parent ever wants to hear when dropping their kid at a play date: “Come on in.”

Trending via Slack:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Now that I got a library card, I’m moving differently.

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

2 months ago

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Commentary:
Relatable! My bedtime rebelled and now it's the boss. 😴🕒😂

bedtime, charge, humor, i, life, mess, own, put, responsibility, self-control

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Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Do you laugh at your own jokes, or are you emotionally stable?

11 shares on Messenger this month:

Your honor, I was under the impression it was hammer time.

39 shares on TikTok this month:

Here’s the problem with fruit: it’s inconsistent. Some apples are delicious, some taste bad. Sometimes blueberries are great, sometimes they are disgusting. You know what’s the same every time? Doritos.

54 shares on Twitch this month:

Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

65 shares on Twitch this month:

Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

40 shares on Instagram this month:

What would boomers do without their paper shredder?

38 shares on Snapchat this month:

It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest.

38 shares on Messenger this month:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

64 shares on Instagram this month:

Staring at your phone is a great way to miss a few years of your life.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has bookmarked:

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Sometimes you need to turn the music up louder and sort your shit out.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

A worm is a pretty disappointing prize for getting up early, if you ask me.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I should’ve been an air conditioner because all I do is vent.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

Why do chefs always have to cut everything so fast? It’s just an onion man, why don’t you relax?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

My DMs are always open if you want to talk to yourself.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

My cat runs a secret cult. I just pay the rent.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Hardest part of beekeeping is thinking of all the names.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

When you have bad handwriting, notes to yourself are just fun little mysteries you get to solve later on.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

I am not the person I thought I was when I cut that donut in half.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Me, aged 20: This is internship summer. I will get an internship. I will find a job. I will study. I will read. I will learn piano. I will… Me, nowadays: This summer, I’m going to try all of the ice cream flavors.

Seen just now on Reddit:

You can fake a smile, but you can’t fake jazz hands.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Your twenties are for destroying and betraying yourself for nothing.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

Shared recently on Discord:

Do other people remember toasters with wings flying across our computer screens or was that a fever dream I just had?

Live now on WhatsApp:

That awkward moment when you try something on in a shop but you don’t know if you can get it off again.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

“Each to their own!” Translation: You’re wrong, but never mind.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Tiime isn’t on my side, it’s on my face, wrinkling my forehead.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

If you compliment me, my glasses fog up.

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

I’m now at the age where sitting cross-legged on the floor is punishable by about three days of full-body paralysis.

Bloopers in movie credits is a lost art form.

An Amish party in the desert called churning man.

If you compliment me, my glasses fog up.

Don’t disrespect me and then be the moral compass on how I respond.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨