My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

‘Tis the season to wrap objects in colorful paper with the fine motor skills of a T-Rex.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Being an adult means your pain never goes away, it just migrates to a new location in your body.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

I went to clean bathroom and I’m 99% sure my kids shoot their toothpaste out of a cannon.

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A murder on the dance floor would explain the panic! at the disco.

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Accidentally turned my clocks back too far and ended up at a Wham concert.

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You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

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How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

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Donuts are beautiful creatures, and they deserve their own week on the nature channels.

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I think something is so beautifully wrong with you.

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I’d trust a groundhog over a weatherman any day.