Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, the shocking irony of it all! 🙈💔 A defibrillator that fails to do its job truly leaves us all… well, not shocked! ⚡😂 Maybe it needs a little 'electrifying' pep talk to get back in the game! 💪😜"

defibrillator, expectation, failure, humor, irony, joke, medical, medical joke, shock, work

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12 shares on X this month:

If they can bring back the dire wolf, they can bring back Norm Macdonald.

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Voice messages. Just call, goddamnit!

74 shares on X this month:

What’s said in the blanket fort, stays in the blanket fort.

71 shares on Instagram this month:

One of my greatest strengths is appearing busy so people don’t try to speak to me.

14 shares on Pinterest this month:

Wednesday is the part of the novel where the heroine stares out the window and questions everything.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

My body snaps, crackles, and pops louder than my cereal.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Technically, all restaurants are drive-thru, it just depends how committed to the task you are.

45 shares on Slack this month:

It’s wild that you can just do anything. Date the wrong person, choose the wrong career. You can go outside and start eating dirt if you want, and the universe lets you. Not even a pop-up like “Are you sure?“

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

You know that moment when you get up in the morning, you’re full of energy and you can’t wait to get to work? Me neither!

34 shares on Snapchat this month:

Tired of looking at a bad screen. Can’t wait to get home and look at a good screen.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

The people who are $30 trillion in debt are giving you a credit score.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has downloaded:

I did vote once but only because I thought the line was to a buffet.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Due to inflation, you can now eat food that has been on the floor for up to 7.3 seconds.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has downloaded:

So far, every Miss Universe winner has been from Earth.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

I don’t understand people who say “I don’t know how to thank you.” Like they never heard of money.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has shared:

Bears and worms have almost nothing in common. But gummy bears and gummy worms? Very similar.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has copied:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Snapchat:

Having leftover pizza for breakfast is an actual blessing.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Pouring an ice-cold glass of anxiety.

Just landed via Instagram:

Whether you rip off a bandaid quickly or slowly, I find it’s best to ask the wearer’s permission first.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Telling the cop I’ll give him his nose back if he lowers his firearm.

Spreading quickly via X:

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Just shared via Discord:

I don’t want to do exercise, but I want to have done exercise.

Trending via Pinterest:

Here’s a fun activity you can do with your kids on rainy days when they have too much energy: Go shopping and leave them at home with their dad.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I look like a casual, laid-back guy, but it’s like a circus in my head.

Just landed via Messenger:

Technically, all the money I have ever spent on food has been flushed down the toilet.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I have never seen an alcohol company using a drunk person for any advertising, are they ashamed of their customers?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

So I just checked my bank account, and it looks like for Christmas I am getting everyone the thought that counts.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I’m at an age now where I start sentences with “I’m at an age now.”

I was gonna kiss you under the blood moon eclipse, but whatever, bro.

It’s only a family vacation if you think “We’re never doing this again” at least once.

Fun fact: the creator of Barbie and the creator of Hot Wheels were husband and wife.

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

So I just checked my bank account, and it looks like for Christmas I am getting everyone the thought that counts.

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