Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇫 has viewed:

Not now, babe, it’s my nightly phone enrichment time.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has bookmarked:

If you’re dating an alpha female, you need to know that they need to be babied at night, or else they will turn into a dragon.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

These aliens are taking forever.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Whoever named them fitting rooms has a lot of nerve.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to annoy the shit out of a beautiful man for the rest of my life.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

Revenge is a dish best served by cutting a sandwich horizontally instead of diagonally.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

Sending messages is easy. Living with them forever is the hard part.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has shared:

Having a loose stool means two completely different things depending on if you are a nurse or a bartender.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,464

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Threads:

Just blocked a guy for accusing me of being “all talk”. On Twitter.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Pumpkin spice season comes earlier every year and yet some still deny climate change.

Making waves on Twitch:

I just need a day between everyday… to recover from the day before… just so I can prepare for the day coming.

Breaking via Threads:

Butterflies all seem so nice but I’ll bet some of them are real bastards.

Trending via Twitch:

If the only person you’re competing with is yourself, how could you lose?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Going viral on Instagram:

Okay, that’s enough todaying for today.

Shared recently on Discord:

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

Going viral on Instagram:

Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

Nothing humbles you faster than rereading something you were proud of yesterday.

13 hours ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about humility and self-reflection, with a humorous and playful tone.

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Commentary:
When you realize yesterday's brilliance was actually just a cosmic joke on your ego 😂🤦‍♂️✨

faster, growth, humble, humor, mistake, nothing, pride, proud, reread, self-reflection, something, writing, yesterday

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

2 days ago

attitude, dark, dark humor, here, humor, irony, joy, just, little, mood, optimism, positivity, resilience, spread, trying, while, world, wrong
I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

2 weeks ago

asking, communication, different, humor, i, meaning, meant, memory, nostalgia, remember, someone, something, x
Stay humble and play dumb. People reveal who they truly are when they think they are smarter than you.

2 days ago

behavior, dumb, humble, humor, intelligence, interaction, people, personality, play, play dumb, psychology, reveal, self-awareness, smarter, social, social interaction, stay, think, truly
Sunday should be 48 hours instead of 24 hours, I need more time to be ready for Monday.

2 days ago

48, hour, hours, humor, i, Monday, need, procrastination, ready, should, Sunday, time, weekend
Do we barbecue with women or without salad?

2 weeks ago

activity, barbecue, cooking, fun, fun activity, humor, salad, women
Coffee is just goth water.

2 weeks ago

beverage, coffee, dark, goth, humor, just, water

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on TikTok this month:

90% of the things I worry about never happen. Worrying works.

83 shares on Threads this month:

After you do your laundry, you should be allowed to get in the dryer and tumble for a little. No charge.

31 shares on Snapchat this month:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea Señor.

10 shares on Slack this month:

Who called it a Cybertruck and not a Deplorean?

19 shares on Discord this month:

My sleeping pattern ain’t even a pattern anymore, it’s a freestyle that’s on shuffle.

65 shares on Threads this month:

My favorite part about going camping is the part where I stay at home, and I don’t go camping.

41 shares on YouTube this month:

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Back to work at last! I couldn’t sleep for sheer anticipation.

83 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Lois Lane said, “Clark?” like she didn’t just make out with that same jawline in spandex twelve hours ago.

19 shares on Twitch this month:

They should invent a way to delete other people’s posts.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

The problem with people starts when we expect things from them, or have anything to do with them.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Getting your hair washed by someone else is one of life’s greatest joys no one really speaks about often.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

Eating fast food shouldn’t count for calories because it’s not around long enough.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has viewed:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has bookmarked:

I lost my job at NASA Mission Control today. I misheard when they said, “It’s lunch time.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

My signature move is to tell men that I can’t hear them because I have my headphones in when I quite visibly don’t have headphones in.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

At first I’m shy, then I’m a podcast.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

When you’re talking to someone and you can tell they’re trying out a new word.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

Trending via Instagram:

Other people: You should get out of your comfort zone. Me: You should get out of my comfort zone.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Spotted on Messenger:

Shazam-ing a song in public feels the same as taking out a big hammer and bonking yourself on the head.

Making waves on Telegram:

I’ll never salute you, General Settings.

Going viral on Twitch:

People keep inviting me to stuff. I miss the pandemic.

Going viral on Instagram:

If McDonald’s sold hot dogs, would you be able to, with a straight face, order a McWiener and tell them to supersize it?

Seen just now on Discord:

Stop blaming others for your mistakes. Study Feng Shui and blame the furniture.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Cheer up! Your biggest mistake is probably still ahead of you.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Becoming a man doesn’t happen the first time you fight or make love. It happens the first time you see the gas bill and remind everyone that we aren’t trying to heat the outside.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nothing humbles you faster than rereading something you were proud of yesterday.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I’m just here trying to spread a little joy while the world burns. Is that so wrong?

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

Stay humble and play dumb. People reveal who they truly are when they think they are smarter than you.

Sunday should be 48 hours instead of 24 hours, I need more time to be ready for Monday.

Do we barbecue with women or without salad?

Coffee is just goth water.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨