Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Keep moving, lady, I don’t have room for you in my delusions right now.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

If you’re happy and you know it, keep it to yourself. No one likes a braggart.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

I went to a mind reader. She almost went mad.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Mr. Beast is like if they made Dubai into a person.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

If you step on the back of my shoe and it comes off, I will do the same thing to your head.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

They should invent a type of sleeping where you wake up feeling rested.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Date idea: you tell me every thought you’ve ever had about me.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Your opinions are not my business.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

Respect people who wear glasses because they paid money to see you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

296 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,565

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,565

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,721

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

You think you’re your own worst critic? Just wait till you have kids.

Just landed via X:

Therapists are like, “You don’t owe anyone anything. Except me. You owe me 250 dollars for this session.”

Shared recently on Pinterest:

People singing Happy Birthday to you feels like a real-life unskippable ad.

Trending via Slack:

Reverse cowgirl because first dates are awkward.

Just shared via Slack:

Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

Trending via Reddit:

Savannah is one of the only girl’s names that’s also a significant “biome”.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

Shared recently on Reddit:

I caught your husband cheating on you at an Alanis concert, and thought you, you, you oughta know.

Live now on Telegram:

Tupperware is filing for bankruptcy. They would have kept a lid on the news but they couldn’t find one.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

‘Tis the season to wrap objects in colorful paper with the fine motor skills of a T-Rex.

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

3 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your social battery crashes harder than your phone on 1% at 3:59 p.m. 🤯🔋📅

4, 4 p.m., appointment, day, introvert, nothing, p.m., ruin, ruins

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I love saying “exactly” to stuff that doesn’t make sense.

2 months ago

communication, exactly, humor, i, love, nonsense, reaction, saying, sense, stuff
Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

2 months ago

activity, conversation, conversation starter, crossroads, dark, Dark Lord, every, funny activity, hug, humor, interesting, intrigue, lord, starter, surprise, whisper
I’ve got a neighbor who’s really into morons. I should introduce her to you guys.

2 months ago

guys, humor, i, interaction, introduce, introduction, moron, neighbor, sarcasm, should, social, social interaction
It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

2 months ago

amazing, culture, fandom, future, humor, irony, mad, Mad Max, max, people, pop, pop culture, prospect, rave, same, sci-fi, star, Star Trek, Star Wars, sure, time, trek, wars
Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

2 months ago

beautiful, fun, humor, irony, just, laughter, life, sober
Each day on Twitter, there is one main character. The goal is to never be it.

6 months ago

character, daily, day, goal, humor, identity, main, main character, media, never, social, social media, Twitter

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

94 shares on WeChat this month:

Watching Unsolved Mysteries and getting mad when they don’t solve the mystery at the end.

79 shares on TikTok this month:

After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

76 shares on Reddit this month:

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic.

26 shares on Discord this month:

Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

53 shares on Messenger this month:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

53 shares on Reddit this month:

My heart says, chocolate and wine, but my jeans say “Woman, are you kidding? Eat a salad!”

24 shares on Reddit this month:

Ever since I was a little kid, I knew I would be fraught with melancholy and nostalgia.

20 shares on TikTok this month:

I identify as a weather forecast: Anything’s possible.

80 shares on WeChat this month:

Scams used to be like “free money!” and now they’re like “hello, we have a job for you”, which seems to be a bad sign.

96 shares on Twitch this month:

Fact: cats sit on your lap to dominate you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m going spiraling, do you need anything?

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

You should be allowed to leave work early if you are really in love.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

Smithereens is the worst way to get blown.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

You’re the human embodiment of an “ugh.”

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

No matter how early you get up, fate always gets up half an hour earlier.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

I’m so cold, I wish I could get in the dryer.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has shared:

Yes, I know there is a really special place in hell for me. It’s called a throne.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

People who quit their jobs before having a backup job lined up ain’t scared of nothing.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

The true horror genre: my old Facebook statuses.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

I knew school was a scam when my business teacher didn’t own a business, and my PE teacher was fat.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

My tombstone will read “Hey there, I’m using WhatsApp!”.

Spotted on Reddit:

Always remember you’re someone’s reason to smile. Because you’re a joke.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’m upset that my parents never got rich enough for me to become a socialist.

Going viral on Telegram:

When they make a Hate Island, somebody link me.

Just shared via Slack:

It’s cool that women want me, but it makes me sad that fish fear me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nothing ruins an introvert’s day like a 4 p.m. appointment.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I love saying “exactly” to stuff that doesn’t make sense.

Make every hug more interesting by mysteriously whispering, “the Dark Lord stands at the crossroads!”

I’ve got a neighbor who’s really into morons. I should introduce her to you guys.

It’s amazing how so many people can rave about Star Wars or Star Trek and at the same time make sure that the only realistic future prospect is Mad Max.

Life can be so beautiful, you just can’t get sober.

Each day on Twitter, there is one main character. The goal is to never be it.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨