Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Anyone know if we got the meek inheriting the Earth today?

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Every CVS has its own unique energy that’s powerful enough to exalt or destroy the individual.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Being a parent means hearing a noise at 3 a.m. and hoping it’s just a ghost and not your toddler getting up again.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

If you need ChatGPT to write an email, maybe you shouldn’t have job.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Girls be like, “Baby, I have a great idea,” and it’s a trip you have to pay for.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

“Do something with your life.” Um, I am. Have you heard of a little thing called squandering?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

After a lot of experience, I can conclude that one can never actually cross “washing dishes” off the to-do list.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Dear wallet, please get pregnant.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Nothing more rude than taking a photo of yourself and it looking like how you actually look, and not how you look inside your head.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,724

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Discord:

The real challenge of adulthood is figuring out what to eat every day.

Making waves on X:

Absurdity is the spice of life.

Trending via WeChat:

Ladies, if a man says he will fix something, he will. There is no need to remind him every 6 months about it.

Just landed via Messenger:

Might go to prison so I can focus on the gym properly.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

The most surprising part of adulthood is parenting your parents.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Sorry, I can’t hang out. I don’t know enough words.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

I’ve convinced myself bumblebees don’t sting because they’re too fluffy and cute.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

God, on inventing the tiger: “Okay, so this is going to be some kind of cat that likes to eat Frosted Flakes.”

Spotted on Discord:

70% of marriage is yelling “What” from a different room.

Just landed via Messenger:

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

5 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Trying to find the off switch…it's like playing hide and seek with a ninja! 🧠🤔😂

brain, break, distraction, humor, just, mental, mental break, off switch, procrastination, switch

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My husband loves it when he orders fries, I say I don’t want any, and then I swoop in on his like a seagull at the beach.

0

4 months ago

beach, behavior, food, fry, funny behavior, humor, husband, i, relationship, say, seagull, snack, stealing, stealing food, want
I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

0

2 months ago

antidepressant, baby, baby name, humor, i, irony, later, learn, mom, name, naming, new, new mom, only, parenting, pick, try, unique, unique name, wonder
When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

0

2 months ago

childhood, family, found, humor, joke, kid, moved, nostalgia, parent, parents
Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

0

5 months ago

humor, name, picked, sneeze, sounds, wordplay
I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

0

2 months ago

being, boss, humor, i, independence, lot, me, motivation, paid, salary, self employment, should, workplace, workplace humor
Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

0

2 months ago

before, childhood, drawing, family, fridge, furious, going, humor, internet, meant, nostalgia, sibling, viral

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

99 shares on Twitch this month:

I always have a cheap bottle of wine in the house in case any family visit.

36 shares on Discord this month:

I love to see “pan-fried” on a menu. I hate food that’s fried in a shoe.

21 shares on Twitch this month:

You know the nap is good when it left you marks.

60 shares on YouTube this month:

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

29 shares on Snapchat this month:

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

35 shares on Discord this month:

The only thing keeping me from world domination is a good nap.

55 shares on YouTube this month:

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

66 shares on YouTube this month:

The Princess and the Pea, except it’s a rogue hair on the inside of my shirt driving me crazy all day.

47 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

86 shares on Threads this month:

We literally used to write an essay by hand.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

People just don’t build cities on rock and roll anymore.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

If you love a friend, let them go. If they come back with coffee, it was meant to be.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

Fun Fact: Dove chocolate tastes way better than their soap.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but my date returned after using the restroom.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

Turns out, college is all about forming unspoken, powerful bonds with people you talk to twice.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has viewed:

When I become president, any public holiday that falls on a Thursday automatically extends to Friday.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

Don’t come to my house unannounced. I will stare at you from my window.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Messed up and threw a surprise party for my minimalist friend. Now 25 of us are hiding behind the granite orb.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Born to be a hater but forced to understand where you’re coming from.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Watching a movie on the plane? No thanks. Watching my seatmate’s movie with no audio and not understanding what’s going on for over an hour? Yassss.

Freshly posted on X:

Grok, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Live now on Threads:

I like my mornings to be slow and quiet. I want the day to romance me a bit before it tries to mess me up.

Going viral on X:

I just want everyone to know that somebody cares. Not me, but somebody does.

Live now on Threads:

I’m writing a book on the joys of drinking beer. So far I’ve been through a lot of drafts.

Making waves on Telegram:

Adulting’s a total scam. Bills, taxes, and a laundry pile that breeds in the dark, were not in the brochure!

Breaking via Threads:

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

Going viral on WeChat:

Ever since I was young, I knew I wanted to be online nonstop.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Never understood when the movie rating says “May contain nudity.” Are there people on the ratings board who aren’t sure if they just saw someone naked?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My husband loves it when he orders fries, I say I don’t want any, and then I swoop in on his like a seagull at the beach.

I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.

When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.

Labubu?! Sounds like a name picked mid-sneeze!

I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨