People are like lottery tickets, most of them are losers.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

Your call is very important to us, here’s six days of irritating music.

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Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

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Cheeseburgers should be free for anyone that’s in a bad mood.

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Whenever I’m not eating a breakfast sandwich I wish I was eating a breakfast sandwich.

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Your opinions are not my business.

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My bad if I ever left you on read. I didn’t mean to open the message.

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She took all my money, called me fat, AND stabbed me in the arm. I hate doctor appointments.

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Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

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Livin’ la vida vodka!

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If I climbed all the way to the top of Mount Everest and looked up, then I’d finally see the top of our family’s weekly laundry pile.