Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who knew that hill-walking could be mistaken for an emergency cardio workout? 🚑 Next time, maybe we'll add a fake oxygen tank for dramatic effect! 💨 #WalkingTales"

911, breathe, call, ever, exercise, hand, hill, quieter, raise, relatable, strangers, tried, walking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on X this month:

Y’all be riding them bikes in the street like I don’t gotta look up my next song.

75 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Job interviewer: “Where do you see yourself in 5 years’ time?” Me: “My greatest strength is that I’m a good listener.”

69 shares on WeChat this month:

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

99 shares on Discord this month:

It’s easy to keep me happy: feed me sunshine in summer — and keep me warm in winter.

38 shares on WeChat this month:

They say money can’t buy happiness, but could someone just give me a lot of it and let me see for myself?

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Your honor, my client wasn’t trying to stab the victim. He was checking to see if he was cake.

74 shares on Snapchat this month:

It’s Sunday. I’ve slept in and ignored church. Somewhere the devil is sitting and clicking on “Like”.

95 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nothing more dangerous than an ignorant man who thinks he is a genius.

40 shares on Reddit this month:

You can be having the nicest day and then you have to print something and you know your day is about to fall apart real fast.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

One big difference between men and women is that if a woman says “Smell this,” it usually smells nice.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

I regret to inform you that we must all once again figure out what to make for dinner tonight.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

Icarus loved hot wings.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

When I moved into my new igloo, my friends threw me a surprise housewarming party. Now I’m homeless.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

With certain people, you get nauseous just hearing their name.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

Opening up to people is a scam. Don’t do it.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Asked a German girl for her number, and I’m still waiting for the rest of the digits. So far, all I have is “nine.”

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

Remember when tweets were like: party rocking with a mouse tonight. Piece of cheese gonna have a big bite.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has downloaded:

If I’m ever murdered, feel comfort in knowing I ran my mouth until the bitter end.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

OK, just so everybody’s clear, I’m going to put my glasses on.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Phone dry, no food in the house, I keep dying in my game. I’m such a loser.

Just landed via YouTube:

Sorry, I’m late. I found my old CD collection.

Making waves on YouTube:

Microdosing bungee jumping by bending over to pick up a hair tie.

Spotted on Facebook:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The bank just called and gave me the biggest compliment, said my balance is outstanding. I really needed that today.

Trending via Messenger:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

The October urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a horrifying backstory.

Just shared via YouTube:

I hate texting. Just hunt me like an animal.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

The way my phone’s facial recognition pretends not to recognize me, you’d think I dated it.

Meatloaf is a good safe word. It means I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that…

Social Media Stars ⭐

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Raise your hand if you’ve ever tried to breathe quieter while walking up a hill so strangers didn’t call 911.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

I embarrass myself in front of myself.

Start each day with a positive thought, like: “I can go back to bed in just 17 short hours.”

The way my phone’s facial recognition pretends not to recognize me, you’d think I dated it.

Meatloaf is a good safe word. It means I would do anything for love, but I won’t do that…

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨