Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

“I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

I’d like to shrink you down and add you to my keychain.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Ah, the magical land of Monday—the gift that keeps not giving!

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

Considering joining a cult just for the subsidized housing.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I’m a simple girl, really. I just want to watch the sunset, laugh, drink coffee, and read books. I also want a time machine and a pet dragon.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

Wanna worship each other until the end of all things?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,529

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Very confusing that gross pay is before tax. I always find the number way grosser after tax.

Spotted on TikTok:

I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.

Just shared via X:

My dream DUI is driving a Saab through the Great British Bake Off tent.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

It’s legally required that you lose a frisbee onto the roof within one week of purchase.

Spotted on YouTube:

My computer: Consider changing your password. Me: Consider fighting me in the streets.

Just shared via X:

I’m glad I have boobs. The last thing I need is people making eye contact with me.

Just shared via Reddit:

Outfit repeater. Meal repeater. Movie rewatcher. I know what I like.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I love when my friends have quiet boyfriends. Like, girl, your dog is so good, sis.

Seen just now on Instagram:

It’s lowkey nothing else to do except become a better version of yourself, lol.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I be like, “I needed this,” and it’s just me getting drunk.

Relationship status: We have changed from “I love you” to “I love YouTube”.

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Commentary:
"Looks like love has evolved from heart emojis to YouTube views 📺❤️ Who needs romance when you've got cat videos and DIY tutorials, right? 😂💔 #modernlove"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Facebook this month:

If I was an outlaw in the Wild West, my face would be on unwanted posters.

49 shares on Discord this month:

I mostly choose to stay silent in weird situations but my face has subtitles.

14 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“You look happy.” Thanks, I stopped dating.

30 shares on Discord this month:

A fun thing to do at work is call in sick and stay home.

35 shares on Messenger this month:

Nobody knows my next move. Not even me.

13 shares on Twitch this month:

Not to brag, but I’ve done nothing for several hours.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

Me, having zero balance in my account, viewing houses worth 10 million, and being like, “No, I don’t like the kitchen.”

63 shares on X this month:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

37 shares on Reddit this month:

We’re putting that movie you love back in theaters on one random Wednesday — and we’re not gonna tell you until Tuesday.

43 shares on X this month:

Welcome to your 40s—you run out of breath trying to find your running shoes.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

When I’m on hold and the song ends, I always expect someone to pick up the phone.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m upstairs and the food is downstairs. Send help.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

God creating the duck: waterproof that chicken and give it a kazoo.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

AI is that friend who is always there for you but gives terrible advice.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Having a bathroom switch outside a bathroom and a sibling is a bad combination.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If I were a bird, I know who I’d poop on.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Love is not pushing them down the stairs when you have the opportunity.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Cutting my steak at Texas Roadhouse with my car keys.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,722

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

Anybody else not stopped farting this evening? Asking for a friend.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

If you have a Roomba, but don’t dress it up in little outfits, then what are you even doing?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Pleasantly surprised to discover the treadmill I bought came with a remote control, so I can run it from my recliner.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Getting an entry-level job before the release of ChatGPT in 2022 was like taking the last chopper out of Vietnam. Few realize this yet.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

At the beginning of a relationship, people call their partner’s odd behavior “cute little quirks”. Some years later, the police call it “motive”.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has shared:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

The way I forget stuff at my age, I just know it is over for me after 50.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has shared:

I have decided to purchase the grocery store because it is now cheaper than the groceries inside it.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Messenger:

As a pigeon mother, I would never let my pigeon daughter hang around the station. That’s really no place for a young pigeon lady.

Shared recently on Threads:

If anime hair were real, there would be so much color dysmorphia. Like, imagine getting brown. I would be so pissed.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

Kitchen sex, because it might be your only chance of getting laid on an island this summer.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

If you’re a guy and you’re struggling right now, just remember nobody cares, and it does get worse.

Trending via Telegram:

Idiocracy wasn’t supposed to be a documentary.

Trending via YouTube:

Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.

Shared recently on WeChat:

I get unreasonably happy when a YouTube video has subtitles that aren’t auto-generated.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Don’t understand why electricians aren’t called power rangers, but okay.

Going viral on Instagram:

Does anyone want to fall in love and split rent with me?

Seen just now on Discord:

I love cutting off Teslas. Like you may not let me merge over but your car sure as hell will.

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