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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

The easiest diet is lack of money. You don’t have to do anything.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Used to wonder why my parents couldn’t grasp technology, but now, anytime I see something new, I’m like, “I’m not learning that.”

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

(to the boys in the yard) I hope you brought your own milkshake.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Girls take a picture of their legs in a bubble bath and say “guess where I am”. The library?

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

Has anybody else completely lost it or is it just me and Kanye?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

The collective noun for a group of reply guys is an audacity.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Cats are the best authoritarians. You will do their bidding, and you will like it.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Do I work hard? No. But do I work smart to compensate. Absolutely not.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,546

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

My social circle is so small that when the phone rings, I know it’s scammers.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Oh right, like you’ve never let your kids stay lost in a corn maze just a little longer.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Can we get some A.I. to pick plastic out of the ocean, or do all the robots need to be poets?

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

When I was a kid, we still ate noodles. Then at some point we ate pasta. Today, we only eat carbs.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

I don’t always listen to Metallica, but when I do, so do my neighbors.

Going viral on Twitch:

Main difference between me and my jokes is that folks don’t laugh at my jokes.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

You look like you suck at Mario Kart.

Trending via Facebook:

I want this laziness removed from my body.

Just landed via YouTube:

I am grateful for my experiences. I just didn’t need them all.

Making waves on Reddit:

I don’t even check my bank account no more. I just swipe my card and if it’s god’s will, money will be debited.

Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.

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Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.
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Commentary:
"When Botox wasn't the true villain of the story! 😂🎬💉"

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Social Media Stars ⭐

42 shares on Reddit this month:

I bet before the band got popular, Barenaked Ladies concerts had a lot of pissed off attendees.

65 shares on WeChat this month:

Is it just me or does everything cost like we’re shopping in an airport now?

30 shares on Threads this month:

Being bi means you say both yay and bruh.

93 shares on Messenger this month:

At the club asking for Ibuprofen.

53 shares on Instagram this month:

I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.

69 shares on Slack this month:

What kind of psychopath wants to be the life of the party?

85 shares on Twitch this month:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Oh, to be a rich, beautiful woman in her big car, driving to buy overpriced groceries to stock up her breathtaking kitchen in her gorgeous house.

45 shares on Facebook this month:

Relationship status: he escaped.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

15 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing I miss from my past is that flat stomach I had.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I hate the person I become when I try to open a package using the ‘Tear Here’ notch, and it stays sealed.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Experts say that human interaction is important for brain health but I’m willing to risk it.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Just accidentally closed a tab I’ve had been meaning to read for the past 2 years.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m tired of being an adult. Therefore, I will be stepping down. Thank you!

10 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not well rested. Sleeping Beauty was well rested.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

My ducks: in a row. My elephant: addressed. My eggs: several baskets. My bigger fish: fried.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Honk shuah. Sleep on that thang!

11 folks are currently checking 👀

If you pass out in front of your kids they will either try to call an ambulance or use you as a trampoline. You just don’t know.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

I would go out of my mind, but I can’t find the exit.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,585

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has viewed:

At first I’m shy, then I’m a podcast.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

The other day, I got the crazy idea to see if I could still do a cartwheel. I can’t.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

Dear life, when I said “can this day get any worse” it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Moving houses/apartments gotta be top 3 worst human experiences.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

The people who upload old movies to the internet are holding society together.

Going viral on Messenger:

If you need me, I’ll be in the shower pretending I can sing.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I was abducted by aliens. They made me wash my hands, clean my room, and eat my vegetables. Turns out I was on the mothership.

Live now on WeChat:

It’s funny how when you’re at work, “Go to hell” comes out as “No problem.”

Trending via Telegram:

How I clean my room: 1. Start in one corner. 2. Find something from six years ago and stare at it nostalgically for five hours. 3. Go to bed.

Making waves on Reddit:

Sorry, I would love to, but I just made a bunch of rules for myself, and I’m actually not allowed to do that.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If by ‘leg day’ you mean a day that we put your legs on my shoulders, then yes, I love leg day.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I stay away from beef-flavored cat food. At no point could Sylvia realistically bring down a cow, and I don’t need that kind of ego in the house.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I love being single because how could I explain a 2 p.m. – 5 p.m. nap on a Saturday.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Wisdom of the day: Don’t do anything you don’t want to explain to the paramedic.

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