Running to the boarding gate is my favorite workout.

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You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.

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“Still gangsta” I whisper to myself as I drink my chamomile tea with a heating pad on my back.

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Tomorrow isn’t promised, so eat that cake today.

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A cheat code to adulting is to always have something to look forward to, no matter how small or big.

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Time is precious, waste it wisely.

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Companies post open positions online and then ask you why you applied to them.

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Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

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My favorite things about Texas are definitely toast and chainsaw massacres.

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I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

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I just locked eyes with a spider. But instead of killing him I ran away and hid, so he can spend the night stressing about where I am.