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Commentary:
Looks like Santa is trading his milk and cookies for something a bit stronger this year! 🎅🥃 Who knew St. Nick was into the hard stuff? Maybe that's the real secret behind his jolly demeanor! 😄🍪

Christmas, drinks, holiday, humor, joke, leave, me, milk, Santa, whiskey

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Welcome to adulthood. You have a favorite gas station now.

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2 months ago

adulthood, favorite, funny observation, gas, gas station, humor, life, life transition, observation, responsibility, station, transition, welcome
“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

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2 months ago

age, getting, grandparent, grandparents, having, humor, i, nostalgia, realization, realize, upstairs, vacuum, where
Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

0

2 months ago

always, casual, fashion, favorite, humor, outfit, outfits, relationship, shirt, underwear
My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

0

2 months ago

activity, dance, dance move, favorite, getting, getting out, humor, move, own, self, trying
They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

0

5 months ago

alternative, animal, animals, burger, crazy, crazy idea, food, food innovation, idea, innovation, invent, invention, lab-grown, lab-grown meat, mammoth, meat, meat alternative, new, new animal, should, something
Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

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2 months ago

bowel, bowel movement, daily, daily routine, humor, life, living, movement, people, routine

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

37 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

78 shares on Threads this month:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

My whole life just flashed before my eyes and there was way too much pizza.

44 shares on X this month:

I swear, if my memory was any worse, I could plan my own surprise party.

73 shares on Threads this month:

Back in the good old days, we didn’t have to trim our toenails, they just got wore down naturally from running from dinosaurs.

39 shares on Twitch this month:

I’m the type of idiot to be loyal during the talking stage.

89 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.

65 shares on Reddit this month:

Funny that all this nonsense just stayed in people’s heads before Twitter came along.

72 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My neighbors were up shouting all night. I could barely hear my bagpipes.

18 shares on WeChat this month:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

If you’re tired of “food” and want to try something a bit more sophisticated, may I recommend “cuisine”?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

Remember when movies felt real, and foreheads could wrinkle.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

If it was really a smart phone, it would have recognize that it was an ignored call, not missed.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Even if you like anime, you gotta still wear deodorant, man.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Painted a big H in my garden to see if I can trap a helicopter. Wish me luck!

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has bookmarked:

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

My neighbors were yelling so loud at their kids to clean up their room that out of fear even I started cleaning my room.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

Be yourself cause no one wants to be like you!

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Ending my thesis paper with “but who cares what I think?”

Going bananas on Slack:

I’m so jealous of people who know how to shut up. I shut up, and subtitles come out my face.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Funny that the Three Wise Men brought probably the three worst presents for a newborn baby.

Making waves on Facebook:

Ok, new plan, I’m gonna marry a Kardashian.

Breaking via Slack:

Ragebaiting each other is flirting, btw.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Opening a bakery and calling it “I’m a crepe. I’m a weird dough.”

Making waves on TikTok:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Spotted on Messenger:

Due to inflation, a picture is now worth 2300 words.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

December, give me a sweet ending for this year please.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Welcome to adulthood. You have a favorite gas station now.

“I’m getting to an age where I realize I shouldn’t have laughed at my grandparents for having an ‘upstairs’ vacuum.”

Of all her outfits, my shirt and no underwear will always be my favorite.

My favorite dance move is trying to get out of my own way.

They should go crazier with lab-grown meat. Invent some new animals or something. Mammoth burger.

Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨