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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

The thing about sleep is that I’d like to get some of it.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Stomach: I will now demonstrate a blue whale’s mating call.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

When you have bad handwriting, notes to yourself are just fun little mysteries you get to solve later on.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has viewed:

The lion is actually pretty concerned right now.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

My boyfriend is mad at me because I keep replying with a fire extinguisher emoji to every girl that comments with a flame emoji on his pictures.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

I highly recommend having hobbies, it distracts you from falling in love unnecessarily.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

God saw you do that.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,539

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I was about to organise my closet, but I then I found what I was looking for.

Breaking via TikTok:

The absolute injustice of being asked to come and take away the boxes of junk that you’ve been storing at your parents’ house for 20 years.

Just landed via Instagram:

A vibrator is amazing but it doesn’t call me “good girl” unfortunately.

Shared recently on X:

12 people have been to the moon and only 8 people have won Takeshi’s Castle. Really makes you think.

Shared recently on X:

To get my cat to eat, I tell him about all the hungry cats in Catfrica.

Just landed via Telegram:

I think I’ll just sit here and waste oxygen all day.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Why did they call it an Amazon wishlist and not an ‘Oughttobuyography’.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

And what do we do when we are sad? “Add to cart”

Going viral on Facebook:

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

Making waves on YouTube:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Shade coming from a tree bearing no fruit could never phase me. Carry on.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your best insult is as empty as your fruit basket 🌳🍏🚫🍑 Carry on, noble tree! 🍃😄

attitude, carry, comeback, coming, confidence, fruit, humor, me, never, phase, shade, tree

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t want to do exercise, but I want to have done exercise.

0

2 months ago

desire, done, effort, exercise, fitness, humor, i, irony, motivation, procrastination, self-improvement, want
No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

0

2 months ago

defibrillator, expectation, failure, humor, irony, joke, medical, medical joke, shock, work
Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

0

5 months ago

2, car, driving, gangsta’s, Gangsta’s Paradise, hand, hand position, hands, home, humor, listening, music, nostalgia, paradise, position, road, road safety, safety, song
Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

0

2 months ago

around, autumn, fashion, humor, men, run, seasons, summer, winter, women
I hate it when I imagine how a conversation will go and then in the actual conversation the person goes off script. That’s not your line, man.

0

2 months ago

conversation, expectations, frustration, hate, humor, i, imagine, interaction, line, man, person, planning, script, social, social interaction, spontaneity
Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

0

2 months ago

early, every, friend, going, going home, group, home, leaving, leaving early, party, person, social, social group, squad

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on WeChat this month:

Yes, hello, I’d like to exchange my generational trauma for generational wealth, please.

46 shares on X this month:

Worrying is just worshipping the problem.

23 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m convinced the washing machine is a portal to another dimension for socks.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

62 shares on X this month:

I just need my friends to know I would do absolutely anything for them, except reply to their message.

61 shares on Snapchat this month:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

33 shares on Pinterest this month:

My favourite yoga pose is the one where you lay really still and do nothing.

84 shares on TikTok this month:

Sports bars exist. There should be bars for monitoring the situation.

28 shares on TikTok this month:

Thinking of starting a religion around cheese.

17 shares on Reddit this month:

I hate everyone in front of me at this checkout line, everyone behind me is cool.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Took a break from social media because my cat was asleep on my phone.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Is it still murder if they said, “Some other time,” but I thought they said smother time?

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

With me, it isn’t Netflix & chill. It’s Prime & panic.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

I don’t have a welcome mat at my front door because I’m not a liar.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

I received my electricity bill. I think they billed me for sunlight, divine light, and the light at the end of the tunnel.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Kinda in the mood to let my feelings impair my judgement.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Bro to bro: Never get your haircut on the day of a special event.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

The only reason I’d want to go to heaven is to complain to the manager.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

Please no requests for a threesome. If I want to disappoint two people at the same time, I’ll visit my parents.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she won’t notice. Call her fat once and she will never forget. That’s because elephants never forget.

Live now on YouTube:

5pm on a Friday: call me a McDonald’s ice-cream machine because I’m not working.

Going viral on YouTube:

Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I bet my soulmate is out there somewhere pretending everything is fine.

Just shared via Instagram:

Ain’t no way there’s billions of us and nobody got superpowers.

Shared recently on TikTok:

“I’m disgusted by how many of you still use Spotify. I use a fair trade, ethically conscientious mom-and-pop platform called Apple Music.”

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Shade coming from a tree bearing no fruit could never phase me. Carry on.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I don’t want to do exercise, but I want to have done exercise.

No one is shocked when a defibrillator doesn’t work.

Driving home, listening to Gangsta’s Paradise, with my hands at 10 and 2.

Autumn is when men run around like it’s summer and women like it’s winter.

I hate it when I imagine how a conversation will go and then in the actual conversation the person goes off script. That’s not your line, man.

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨