17 funny carry quotes - Wordgag

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

May 27, 2026

Instead of those cute mini pizzas, they should invent gigantic ones that take four people to carry.

May 26, 2026

Pretending I’m asleep so my boss has to carry me to the meeting.

May 25, 2026

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

May 23, 2026

I love cute tiny purses, but I’m sad to say I can never be a cute tiny purse girl. I need to haul my hoard of objects everywhere I go, because what if….

May 23, 2026

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

May 23, 2026

Hilarious when peoples outgoing voicemail message says they “can’t make it to the phone right now.” You carry the phone with you. It’s the only constant in your life.

May 22, 2026

Those guys holding fish in their dating profile pictures are just demonstrating how they’ll carry you over the threshold after marriage.

May 22, 2026

Trying to carry a pet to bed is like moving a dense liquid that’s annoyed by you.

May 22, 2026

A bridesmaid, but to carry the end of my CVS receipt.

May 22, 2026

I don’t always carry all the groceries on one arm, but when I do, my keys are in the wrong pocket.

May 21, 2026

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

May 21, 2026

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

May 21, 2026

Shade coming from a tree bearing no fruit could never phase me. Carry on.

May 19, 2026

My daughter says I’m making it up! Do you remember having to carry a quarter for the payphone, just in case?

May 18, 2026

Men’s jeans have bigger pockets to help them carry all their audacity.

Mar 31, 2026

I like when the superheroes that can fly pick up and carry the ones that can’t.

Mar 30, 2026