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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has copied:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

There’s an app for the people who say they’re not seeking some form of validation here. It’s called a diary.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Spent most of the day making sure my couch still works. So far so good.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

My least controversial opinion is that IKEA should have a bar. I think we were meant to consume three beers and then purchase a Gjörfbunkle.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

British people be like “I’m Bri ish” cause they drank the “T”

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

I want a small, tasteful wedding. No family. No friends. No groom. Just me eating a big cake.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

52 minutes ago

3,443

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

Cause of death: Trying to draw eyebrows on the neighbor’s cat.

Trending via TikTok:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Seen just now on TikTok:

Can’t, holding a grudge.

Just shared via Telegram:

“I made this with AI.” Yeah, we can tell.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Forget my browser history, when I finally pass from this earth, please delete my calculator history because it’s way more embarrassing.

Seen just now on Facebook:

I think you are suffering from a lack of vitamin ME.

Just shared via Threads:

When someone touches my phone, I automatically turn into a ninja.

Spotted on Discord:

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

Seen just now on TikTok:

One of the great joys in this life is looking at your pet’s weird little teeth.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’ve started ripping my shirt in half like Hulk Hogan when I mean business. Long story short, I’m looking for a new job.

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

6 months ago

Should I ever be mean and insulting, then it comes from the bottom of my heart.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah, the perfect excuse for cheeky comments and sassy comebacks! 😈💬 After all, why insult with just any part of your heart when you can go straight for the bottom? 🙊💔 Just remember to sprinkle some love in there too! ❤️😜"

bottom, ever, heart, honesty, humor, i, insulting, irony, mean, should, sincerity

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

6 months ago
Share → : The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!
6 months ago
Share → : Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.
6 months ago
Share → : Of course, I also put my mobile down from time to time. For example, when someone tries to call me.
3 months ago
Share → : Tested positive for needing a kiss.
3 days ago
Share → : Show me another rule so I can break that one too.
4 months ago
Share → : Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.
3 months ago
Share → : 9-5 is really 10-2 if you’re working remote.
6 months ago
Share → : Most people have 32 teeth. Some have 10. Simple meth.

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

784 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,946

Funny Quotes Topics

13,917

Funny Quotes Images

10,946

52 minutes ago

3,438

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

When I say “I’m open to feedback” I mean “I accept compliments.”

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

It’s not true that I had nothing on. I had the radio on.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

If idiots could fly, TikTok would be an airport.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

This coffee isn’t working. Think I need holy water.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

One day you’re young and fun and the next you’re searching “Thanksgiving recipes that won’t cause heartburn.”

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

When I get tired of shopping, I sit down and try on shoes.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

After I drink coffee, I show my empty cup to the IT guy and say that I have successfully installed Java. He hates me.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

No one declines an incoming call faster than a 3-year-old watching YouTube.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Slack:

Nothing has paid off less than learning to do the Macarena.

Live now on YouTube:

But if i put my laundry away, the laundry chair will be out of a job.

Breaking via Messenger:

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

That moment when you cut into a seedless watermelon and find out it’s only allegedly seedless.

Live now on X:

Quitting my job to focus on being in love.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

If you buy something with a lifetime warranty and it breaks, the manufacturer will send a hitman to your house.

Making waves on Discord:

Meteorologists are always talking about the weather and hardly ever about meteors.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

It sucks when you realize it’s only Thursday, until you realize it’s only Wednesday.

Just shared via WeChat:

When someone yells stop I don’t know whether it’s in the name of love, it’s Hammer time, or I should smell the flowers.

Trending via WeChat:

HR is giving me a hard time because I’ve been starting all my work emails with “Dearly Beloved”.

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