Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Eating cookies left for Santa because the cowboy was a no show.
  • If you get hangovers, it’s because you drank the beers with impure intentions and heavy karmic debt.
  • Hello, boyfriend? It’s me, girlfriend, from dating?
  • I can relate to the stock market because I am always about to crash at a moment’s notice.
  • Donuts have holes in them, just like acoustic guitars, but that’s pretty much where the similarities end.
  • 50% of parenting is just trying to decide if that noise is worth walking up all of those stairs.