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Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

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I've heard of living paycheck to paycheck, but this is a whole new level of urgency! ๐Ÿšฝ๐Ÿ˜‚

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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has bookmarked:

Whoever said โ€œout of sight, out of mindโ€ never had a spider disappear inside their tent.

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When they ask โ€œhow was your weekend?โ€ answer โ€œbetter than yoursโ€ and maintain eye contact.

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When youโ€™re over 40 and a part of your body starts hurting for no reason that is nature sending a โ€œwhat ya doing?โ€ text.

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If you really think about it, extraordinary isnโ€™t that great. Itโ€™s just an extra helping of ordinary.

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Sometimes I wish I was an octopus, so I could slap eight people at once.

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Petition to make check-in at hotels 11am and check-out 3pm, not the other way around. Like, WTF?

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I bought all this healthy food at the grocery store today and now Iโ€™m trying to decide if I want Chinese food or pizza delivered for dinner tonight.

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Declined stepping on the scale at the doctorโ€™s office because no one needs that kind of negativity in her life.

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Itโ€™s funny how when youโ€™re at work, โ€œGo to hellโ€ comes out as โ€œNo problem.โ€

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต has viewed:

Stop being so boyfriendable if you can’t be my boyfriend.