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Someone from 🇲🇳 has shared:

When I tell you “I’m open to feedback” I’m telling you to be nice to me or I’ll resort to violence.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

I once broke up with a guy because he ate half my french fries, and when I get really lonely, I still think about those french fries.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Sure, I could keep my thoughts to myself but I can’t see “Likes” in my journal.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

They said I can never go back to that Vietnamese spot. They banh mi pho life.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Adult peer pressure is seeing your neighbor mow his lawn.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Everybody looks like a criminal on the self-checkout camera.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

My fondest childhood memory is being able to sleep through the entire night and waking up rested.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I’ve spent 80% of my adult life resetting my password.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

I’d end my life from loneliness before I ever talk to ChatGPT like it’s my friend.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

Dating apps aren’t working, time to walk into a cafe looking confused.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

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17,766

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15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

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Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

I’m always a little mean to men because, if you treat them like humans, they think you wanna sleep with them.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

This meeting could have been an AI summary.

Making waves on Snapchat:

The human brain is great. It works from the second you are born and stops as soon as you start liking someone.

Going bananas on Threads:

“I’d love to go to the moon” I said “but on a full moon day of course, no point going all that way when only half of it’s there”

Trending via Telegram:

Some people have goals based on a summer body. Mine revolve entirely around the weight limit of my beach chairs.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Ever look at someone and think you could spend the rest of your life saying “What?” to this person?

Just landed via Threads:

When I look at the world, I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Going viral on WeChat:

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

1 month ago

Witty quote highlighting humor in workplace confidence and imposter syndrome.

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Commentary:
Taking notes for the next office meeting: 1) Develop imposter syndrome, 2) Teach a masterclass on "How Not to Do Your Job" 😂📋💼

actually, benefit, humor, i, imposter, imposter syndrome, job, jobs, little, observation, people, self-doubt, sometimes, syndrome, watch, work

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60 shares on TikTok this month:

Don’t worry, man, we can probably Photoshop the deep and enduring sadness out of your eyes later.

32 shares on Slack this month:

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

39 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s not getting better or worse, but rather a third mysterious thing.

57 shares on Reddit this month:

Really love how dancing alone in your room can literally save your life.

17 shares on Twitch this month:

The most refreshing way to fight your personal demons is to make demonade.

41 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

47 shares on Instagram this month:

My daily routine. Morning: Feeling tired, cranky and lazy. Afternoon: I could go for a nap. Night: I can’t sleep.

75 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Photogenic people are magical. You could snap a pic of them mid- explosive diarrhea, and they’d still look good.

63 shares on YouTube this month:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

35 shares on Threads this month:

Third wheeling with two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

To bed then. To bed with you! Guards, take him to my bed!

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

You don’t need to be a good listener as long as you’re a good nodder.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

We all need to put the phone down, or it’s over for civilization.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

Me: “I should treat myself to something.” My bank account: “Dream on.”

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

New challenge called “don’t say ‘wow it’s already dark by five these days’ for the rest of winter”

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

I just wish I had the confidence of my husband who thinks everything only takes 5 minutes.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

Having a sunburn is so humiliating. Now everyone knows I was unprepared for the realities of the wilderness. It marks me as the weakest link. The hungry animals are closing in.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has copied:

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

Millennials are so young because we were never allowed to grow up. Still living like broke college kids in our 40s.

Making waves on WeChat:

If I turned into a “teen wolf”, my first order of business would definitely be helping my basketball team get to the local championships.

Going viral on Threads:

Sorry I can’t carpool to work. That’s the time I use to angry scream.

Trending via Discord:

Ripping the fishnets off my slutty little oranges.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If you don’t fall in love with me, I’ll write poetry about you and then you’ll regret it.

Spotted on Messenger:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Just landed via Telegram:

There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

Spotted on WeChat:

I’m a huge fan of saying “You’re welcome” really loudly when people don’t say thank you.

Just shared via YouTube:

The way turkeys feel about November is probably how treadmills feel about January.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

We’re so close to “Let’s circle back next year” season, I can taste it.

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Activity Log ✨

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

The Cranberries. Great band name. You pick a fruit and you get to work.

Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

IKEA is like the Hotel California of furniture stores.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sometimes I watch people do their jobs, and I’m like, damn, you might benefit from a little imposter syndrome, actually.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The secret to work life balance is generational wealth.

The Cranberries. Great band name. You pick a fruit and you get to work.

So many people these days are too judgmental. I can tell just by looking at them.

Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

IKEA is like the Hotel California of furniture stores.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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