Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Sorry for my fashionable delay, folks! 🚗🎶 Sometimes you just can't abandon a killer carpool karaoke session, am I right? Until next time, stay tuned for more musical traffic jams! 🎤🕺"

car, end, excuse, humor, i, late, music, song, sorry, waiting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Just stay single, y’all… I’m here apologizing for taking a nap.

0

6 months ago

apology, here, humor, just, laziness, nap, relationship, single, stay, taking
My favorite part of parenting is being exhausted all the time and losing the will to live.

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2 months ago

being, comedy, exhausted, exhaustion, family, fatigue, favorite, humor, live, losing, parenting, struggle, time, will to live
We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

0

2 months ago

Barbie, culture, environmentalism, got, humor, irony, little, microplastic, microplastics, pop, pop culture, self-reflection, us
I am AOL Instant Messenger years old.

0

2 months ago

age, am, AOL, AOL Instant Messenger, chat, i, instant, internet, messaging, messenger, nostalgia, old, technology
Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

0

2 months ago

bad, door, great, humor, neighbor, neighbors, next, people
The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

0

2 months ago

adult, daily, daily life, glasses, head, humor, keys, knees, life, phone, priorities, responsibility, version, wallet

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

87 shares on WhatsApp this month:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

79 shares on Pinterest this month:

Jeez. It’s like the people in this nursing home have never heard techno before.

38 shares on Snapchat this month:

I have to stand in the shower about this.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

Don’t mispronounce anything next to me and think I didn’t hear it.

18 shares on Facebook this month:

Your secret is safe with me because I don’t care.

90 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Life begins when you can afford it.

80 shares on Messenger this month:

When you realize your punishments as a kid (stay home, take a nap, no junk food, go to bed early) are now your goals as an adult.

34 shares on Discord this month:

I just ordered a life alert bracelet, so if I ever get a life, I’ll be notified immediately.

41 shares on Threads this month:

This summer I’m going cicada mode: emerging briefly from my house and being really loud until I find a mate.

69 shares on Telegram this month:

People will think you know what you’re talking about if you give your opinion while cleaning a pair of reading glasses.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

Ever since I learned the show is called Suits because of lawsuits and not because they wear suits, I have harbored a hot white rage within me beyond anything mankind has ever known.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

People will be like “there is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

This is the fastest December in the history of all December.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

You ever get into such a weird mood you have to put yourself on house arrest for a couple days?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has downloaded:

I miss when we didn’t know what celebrities thought about anything.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

The streets are not for me. I belong in an enchanted forest, eating berries, and talking to my animal friends.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

There’s literally no law that says you can’t put your friends down as your references and pretend they were your boss at an old job. Literally, there’s no law that says that.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

I could be a morning person, if morning was sometime around noon.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Perfume and jewelry are two things you can never go wrong with gifting me.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

It’s funny how people without pizzas in their hands actually think I’ll answer my door.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Snapchat:

I’m an adult, that’s why I can have Skittles for dinner.

Just landed via Threads:

DMs full of guys who wouldn’t know what to do with me.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

My kids acting shocked there’s ants in my car like they’re not Hansel and Gretel leaving bloody crumb trails.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Sometimes I’ll do a random act of kindness, like keeping my mouth shut, for example.

Making waves on Reddit:

Being loved right feels like telepathy and a little bit of witchcraft.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I’m naturally funny cause my whole life is a joke.

Spotted on Discord:

Screen time so high, I should send another risky message and then ignore my cell phone for three days.

Trending via Reddit:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

Making waves on Threads:

Grandma complained that with age, her joints were getting weaker. Told her to just roll them a little tighter.

Trending via Instagram:

I talk to one guy, and he wants to break my heart. I talk to five guys, and they all wanna take me seriously.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Sorry I’m late. I was in the car waiting for my song to end.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Just stay single, y’all… I’m here apologizing for taking a nap.

My favorite part of parenting is being exhausted all the time and losing the will to live.

We all got a little Barbie in us (the microplastics).

I am AOL Instant Messenger years old.

Not all people have bad neighbors. The ones next door have a great one.

The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨