Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Girls are happier when their dress has pockets, it’s science.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that’s amore. When you swim in the sea and an eel bites your knee, that’s a moray.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Pro Tip: Never make snow angels in a dog park.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

I’m like the Temu version of a well-functioning adult.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

AI could never steal company time the way I do.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has bookmarked:

Super excited about a brand new year full of questionable life choices.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Having hoes in different area codes sounds really exhausting.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Kissing while both wearing baseball caps is so hard. How do baseball players do it?

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I don’t text. I will contact you telepathically.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

353 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,622

Funny Quotes Topics

17,673

Funny Quotes Images

15,622

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,252

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WeChat:

You know you’re the father of teen boys when a shoe print on the ceiling no longer fazes you.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Hear me out. A waiting room where the doctors wait.

Just shared via Messenger:

If someone steals your joke, you have to file a LOLsuit.

Spotted on Reddit:

A real smartphone would cut you off.

Just landed via WeChat:

The older I get, the more I understand why Grumpy Old Men exist.

Just landed via Reddit:

I love canceling plans. I didn’t want to go in the first place. I just wanted to be invited.

Making waves on Telegram:

Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

Just shared via Messenger:

Don’t blame the holidays, you were already overweight in August.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Not only do I turn down my radio to find a house or a parking spot, but I also take off my sunglasses to hear someone better.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Taking a walk: The most effective debugging tool.

2 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Step away from the screen and let your feet find the bugs 👣🐛 #WalkItOffDebugging

break, coding, debugging, effective, humor, most, problem, problem-solving, productivity, programming, solving, taking, tool, walk, walking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Doggy style means I get a treat afterwards, right?

3 months ago

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When exactly does wisdom kick in? I feel like I’m just getting older.

2 months ago

age, exactly, feel, getting, getting older, humor, i, irony, just, kick, life, older, wisdom
Does no one disappear in the Bermuda Triangle anymore, or is there just too much other news?

2 months ago

bermuda, Bermuda Triangle, current, current events, disappear, events, humor, irony, just, much, mystery, news, too, triangle
Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

2 months ago

education, everyone, fail, glasses, humor, irony, knows, perception, smart, test
Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

1 month ago

apart, argument, conflict, drama, exaggeration, family, humor, me, saying, someone, tearing, whenever
In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

5 months ago

aisle, baking, baking aisle, baking ingredient, booing, buying, everyone, extract, grocery, grocery store, humor, imitation, imitation vanilla, ingredient, shopping, store, vanilla, vanilla extract

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

100 shares on Reddit this month:

Liking a post I don’t understand just to impress the algorithm.

42 shares on Discord this month:

I’m going to die from jealousy one day.

60 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I find myself thinking “God, I need a cigarette” way too often for someone who doesn’t actually smoke.

16 shares on Slack this month:

Not sure why I drink anymore. I get the same effect from standing up too fast.

31 shares on WeChat this month:

Going out for two days in a row should really be considered an extreme sport.

43 shares on Threads this month:

What’s the opposite of FOMO? The feeling of knowing you made the right decision not going somewhere once you see or hear dispatches from it.

27 shares on Instagram this month:

I learned that when dogs lean against you it’s their version of hugging and now every time my dog leans against me my eyes start leaking.

81 shares on Twitch this month:

Don’t let the British accent fool you. I’m not saying anything smart.

13 shares on Discord this month:

Wow, I absolutely love your outfit. The black really brings out the pet hair on it.

22 shares on X this month:

No, babe, I love your prefrontal cortex. The fully developed ones scare me.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has downloaded:

Living your life to the fullest does not have to involve selfies with bison.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has downloaded:

Brave of you to assume you can resist my good looks.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

The problem with salad is, it’s salad.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

A beaver is an otter that has studied architecture.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

Taylor Swift should write a song about when your sleeves keep rolling down every time you wash the dishes.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

Clothes too dirty for the closet, but too clean for laundry. Welcome to: the chair.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

The best addition to any essay is, of course, a condescending tone.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

I’m so disappointed when I help my kid with her homework, and she brings it home marked incorrect.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

I don’t know why we traded horses for cars. Your car won’t stop in front of a river and be like, “no way dumbass, we aren’t going to make that.”

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

Whenever my hormones try to get me to reproduce after all, I go to IKEA and watch the goings-on there. After that, I’m good again.

Just landed via Messenger:

Anytime someone comments on my weight, I try to ignore them and keep my chins up.

Just shared via Instagram:

My mom recently asked me how to take a screenshot. At first, I laughed, but then I remembered she taught me how to tie my shoes.

Just shared via TikTok:

My only plan for this weekend is to move just enough so the people don’t think I’m dead.

Live now on WeChat:

Set my sex robot to boyfriend mode and now it’s liking other girls’ pictures on Insta.

Spotted on X:

Unfortunately, when you don’t burden people with your problems, they assume you don’t have any. Lol.

Just shared via Twitch:

They get real weird at the gun store if you walk in crying and asking for “the biggest one”.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

To everyone who opens the fridge, stares, and closes it hoping new snacks will appear… You’re my people.

Freshly posted on X:

Imagine how organized the first person to write down a recipe must have been.

Breaking via Reddit:

No, babe, I love your prefrontal cortex. The fully developed ones scare me.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Taking a walk: The most effective debugging tool.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Doggy style means I get a treat afterwards, right?

When exactly does wisdom kick in? I feel like I’m just getting older.

Does no one disappear in the Bermuda Triangle anymore, or is there just too much other news?

Glasses don’t make you look smart, everyone knows you had to fail a test to get them.

Saying “You’re tearing this family apart” whenever someone argues with me.

In the baking aisle, booing everyone buying imitation vanilla extract.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨