Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

I have been so toxic and horny lately, I should probably start, like, reading a book or something.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

My wife bought new towels and they’re different colors, so I know the entire color scheme of my house is about to change.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Armed robbers are so weird. Why are you beating me when I don’t have money?

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

At the doctor’s office, booing all the names being called that aren’t mine.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I’m often mistaken for an adult because of my age.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

I have never “lit up a room” unless you count arson.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

In the 80s, you could literally shrink your kids with a shrink-ray, and your wife wouldn’t divorce you. I’m pretty sure I saw a documentary film about it.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s being annoyed by stupidity.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Even on the coldest of days, there’s such peace found in the warm embrace of a hot pizza.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,776

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

Breaking via Reddit:

I wish berries were the size of apples. Just imagine for a second.

Going viral on Messenger:

The collective noun for a group of narcissists should be an ‘egosystem’.

Spotted on Twitch:

I’ve walked the walk, but nowadays I just sit the sit.

Spotted on Slack:

ASAP (as sapphic as possible).

Spreading quickly via Threads:

When I learned the word “literally,” that was the beginning of the end.

Seen just now on YouTube:

There are people on TV who are not ruined by fame, but who ruin fame.

Just landed via Discord:

I used to think I was indecisive, but I’m not too sure any more.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

One day I will start learning from my mistakes. Today is not that day. Tomorrow isn’t looking so good either.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Psych meds aren’t enough anymore. Hit me with a shovel.

The food hits different when it ain’t yours.

1 month ago

Humorous quote about food's impact when it’s not yours, playful and witty in tone.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Oh, the age-old wisdom of appreciating the forbidden fruit! 🍎🤣 That mysterious allure of someone else's snack always seems to make it taste just a bit sweeter, doesn't it? Just like how the neighbor's grass always looks greener… and their lunch always looks yummier! 🍔😋 #FoodEnvy #TasteOfTemptation

context, different, experience, food, hit, hit different, humor, sharing, yours

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Telegram this month:

Airbnb should have an option if you just want to use someone’s bathroom for a few minutes.

57 shares on X this month:

Congratulations on getting to the red light first. You’re special.

46 shares on Telegram this month:

That awkward moment when someone you hate is breathing.

71 shares on Discord this month:

“You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

19 shares on Discord this month:

USPS tracking: Step 1: We don’t think it exists. Step 2: Delivered.

33 shares on Twitch this month:

Male barista called me “my love” yesterday and didn’t say it today… getting mixed signals and feeling really upset.

58 shares on Threads this month:

It’s so rude how many of you have the audacity to be out peopling around whenever I go somewhere.

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My problem with Christmas shopping is that I keep seeing things that I like… for me.

27 shares on Discord this month:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

41 shares on TikTok this month:

The worst part of getting struck by lightning is everyone seeing your skeleton.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

The length of a LinkedIn Post is directly proportional to the amount of bullshit in it.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Old people like to golf every day because they are so sick of everyone’s shit and just wanna repeatedly whack something.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I didn’t like my beard at first… then it grew on me.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

My kid tells me his toothpaste is “too spicy” but he doesn’t seem to be having any trouble with Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I always wonder who makes a more stupid face: women putting on make-up or men shaving?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I love sleeping. You don’t spend any money and you don’t miss anyone.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The problem is I am always the problem.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Does my special place in hell have wi-fi?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,343

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

If you’re late for work, don’t forget to look mad when you walk in.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Selling porn is gross, but selling food and small household items is grocer.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

When you’re over 40 and a part of your body starts hurting for no reason that is nature sending a “what ya doing?” text.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Everything feels like thinking the stripper actually likes you.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

A camel walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, you can’t bring your own drinks in here!”

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WeChat:

I haven’t been with anyone in 3 years. I feel sorry for my next boyfriend. He might not make it through the day.

Just shared via Snapchat:

It takes guts to be an organ donor.

Trending via Discord:

Ever since I turned 20, someone is always in Japan or Italy. Is it like this forever?

Making waves on TikTok:

Excuse me, can you direct me to the nonsense?

Just landed via Discord:

Just because I’m smiling doesn’t mean I like you, I might be picturing you on fire.

Shared recently on Telegram:

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

Shared recently on WeChat:

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

Making waves on WeChat:

Hot singles over 40 in your area are curious what you use for joint pain and inflammation.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

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