Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

If I had 50¢ for every math test I’ve failed, I’d have $7.20.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Remember that your face is literally a combination of hundreds of generations of people who fell in love!

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Good morning. I’m ready for attention now.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

Nothing ruins a Friday like realizing it’s only Wednesday.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has copied:

How can people lift weights? My arms get tired just by putting my hair up in a ponytail.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

I’m not old, I’m vintage.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

The only career advice I have is make every decision that moves you closer to not having to be on LinkedIn.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

Having a mom who cooks good food is such a big flex.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has bookmarked:

As someone with OCD, I can’t help but respect how Pringles are just like, no, this is the order you must eat them in.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

244 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,513

Funny Quotes Topics

17,581

Funny Quotes Images

15,513

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,289

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Women will brag about their intuition, and then date a DJ.

Shared recently on Facebook:

Why can’t I explore the dentist’s mouth too?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Crazy to think the average Zoomer male just works, watches porn, and plays video games. That’s it. That’s their whole life.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Whenever I lose my faith in justice, I look at the high school beauties from back then today. Then I’m fine again.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Unlike the brain, the stomach alerts you when it’s empty.

Seen just now on Telegram:

How do I get recruited by a cult? I need some direction in my life.

Just landed via Messenger:

Do you ever feel like you’re a white shirt and life is a red wine?

Just landed via YouTube:

Just learned in psychology that when a man goes to sleep first, it’s because he’s comfortable around you and wants you to go through his phone.

Trending via Discord:

I don’t jump to conclusions, I cannonball into them like a boss.

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Cats really do have main character energy, and I'm just their loyal sidekick! 😸👑

cat, humor, i, life, narcissist, only, personality, pet, self-love

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

0

2 months ago

boss, humor, i, me, person, productivity, self, should, transformation, work, working, workplace
At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

0

2 months ago

comedy, forgot, gym, headphones, help, humor, i, isolation, listen, own, self-reflection, send, solitude, thoughts, workout
Not commenting on your girl’s stuff is weird. I want my man barking in my comments.

0

4 months ago

barking, comment, comments, girl, girls, i, interaction, man, media, playful, relationship, social, social media, stuff, want, weird
Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

0

2 months ago

bring, consequences, days, devastation, digestive, digestive system, food, holiday, humor, indulgence, nobody, stuffing, system, warning
Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

0

2 months ago

cat, cats, ever, eyes, humor, inside, observation, person, pet, realization, realize
Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

0

2 months ago

challenge, daily, daily challenge, day, difficulty, every, humor, speech, speech difficulty, stutterer

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

98 shares on Twitch this month:

It’s a good friend who, when you want the truth, knows what truth you want.

39 shares on X this month:

Camping? No, thank you. If I wanted to sleep outside, I wouldn’t pay my mortgage.

85 shares on Discord this month:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

94 shares on TikTok this month:

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

Dress for the demons you want, not the demons you have.

81 shares on Snapchat this month:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

71 shares on WeChat this month:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

68 shares on Slack this month:

What you call “Brunch” I call “Breakfast for Alcoholics.”

30 shares on Telegram this month:

People my age are doing so much, and I’m just at home reliving the same day over and over again.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

Liquor store clerk: “Do you need help?” Me: “Yes, but I decided to come here instead.”

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

As a teen: secretly drinking in the park with friends. As an adult: secretly drinking in the park with squirrels.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

Ouija boards are like unannounced phone calls for ghosts.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

I feel like waking up early on the weekend is so disrespectful.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has downloaded:

I just tried on my summer wardrobe. The only thing I managed to get into was a state of panic.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Zara makes clothing for occasions that don’t exist.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

As a man, it’s my job to mistake kindness for flirting.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has copied:

Paid my rent and slept in every room of my house this week, kitchen and laundry room next.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

Naturally introverted, selectively extroverted.

Making waves on X:

My boss denied me a raise before my shift today. What’s some music you have never wanted to hear in a coffee shop?

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

8 pm to 10 pm on a weeknight is the shortest that two hours can possibly be.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Just landed via Instagram:

The Netflix “Recommended For You” list is why I have trust issues.

Making waves on YouTube:

My one cat vomited her dinner and then the other cat went in and started eating it. And that, my friends, is what ChatGPT is to me.

Just landed via Slack:

Marry the man who treats your dumb questions like they’re NASA-level problems.

Live now on Instagram:

If you add orange juice to Jason Momoa, you get a Jason Mimosa.

Spotted on X:

Those astronauts that just landed? They should be greeted by chimpanzees on horses.

Trending via WeChat:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I don’t like the person I become when my boss tells me I should be working while at work.

At the gym and I forgot my headphones and now I have to listen to my own thoughts. Send help.

Not commenting on your girl’s stuff is weird. I want my man barking in my comments.

Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

Do you ever look into your cats eyes and realize that a person is inside there?

Every day is a D-Day, if you’re a stutterer.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨