The only reason to engage with a neighbor is if either of you is on fire.

21 shares on Facebook this month:

Girls only want one thing, and it’s to be photographed candidly on 35mm film.

62 shares on Discord this month:

Rare earth, this rare earth, that. There’s nothing more rare on this earth than affordable housing in a walkable neighborhood.

67 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Adulting is realizing Monday is a better ‘off day’ than Friday.

83 shares on Telegram this month:

Having a kid is so fun when you’re childish, like yeah, it’s my turn with the slime, boo.

47 shares on Snapchat this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here talking baby talk to my plants.

36 shares on Messenger this month:

Drinking 3L of water daily helps you avoid other people’s drama because you’re too busy peeing. Stay hydrated.

51 shares on Pinterest this month:

It’s okay to love your job. Just know it doesn’t love you back.

20 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wish my hair had as much volume as my mouth.

30 shares on Threads this month:

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.