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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

The one thing I think most parents need to realize is, there’s absolutely no secrets that your child doesn’t share about you in the classroom.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

I don’t like being asked “are you at home?” Please expand further so I can know whether I’m at home or not.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

My husband was unable to find his coat earlier as he’d accidentally hung it up.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

I’ve started dating myself exclusively but it’s not working out.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I get tired from just thinking of everything I have to do.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I once made the irresponsible decision to drink and drive and now I have to live the rest of my days with a coffee stain on my favorite sweater.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has downloaded:

Did it hurt, when my ice cream outlasted yours?

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

Looking for someone to take to couples therapy and see how long it takes the therapist to notice we don’t know each other.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has copied:

At the grocery store, but forgot my wife’s list so I guess I’ll just follow this other guy around and get what he gets.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has shared:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

11 minutes ago

3,445

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via TikTok:

It’s like ten thousand tweets when all you need is a life.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

If politicians can text my cell phone asking for money, I should be able to text them directly with policy suggestions.

Shared recently on YouTube:

You know you’re a bad cook when the dog won’t lick the plate.

Shared recently on X:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Reported on Slack:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

Making waves on Twitch:

I don’t want to brag but I found a recipe online, and then within three weeks not only made the recipe, but closed the tab on my browser.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

People delete their social media and start acting like they got a master’s degree in maturity.

Breaking via Instagram:

I am awake and ready to be disappointed.

Making waves on Snapchat:

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Do you also have teenagers whose styling motto is: freeze to death for coolness?

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

2 months ago

The smarter you are, the more important it is for you to figure out how to think less.

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Commentary:
Ah, the paradox of intelligence: winning the brain game but sometimes forgetting to hit pause! 🧠💡 Remember, even Einstein knew when to relax—because overthinking can turn a genius into a over-caffeinated squirrel! ☕🤯 Sometimes, the smartest move is just taking a deep breath and letting the brain take a coffee break. 😌🚀

figure, health, humor, important, intelligence, irony, less, mental, mental health, self-awareness, smarter, think, thinking, wisdom

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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

764 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,926

Funny Quotes Topics

13,898

Funny Quotes Images

10,926

11 minutes ago

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

Cannabis has many benefits. For example, it makes you retarded. But in addition, it also makes you lazy. No worries though, it also makes you fat and insane.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

Gave my family the wrong address for our beach rental. Hoping to get a couple days in before they find me.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

It is kind of inspiring that I messed up my life without drugs, gambling or a troubled youth. People really can do anything.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

I respect the moon’s unwillingness to be photographed on a phone.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I need new friends. The old ones know too much.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Nothing good happens on the credit card after midnight.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Hey, can I get an ETA on that “this too shall pass”?

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

I autograph every hotel Bible I find with “Best wishes, JC”.

Just shared via Reddit:

I hope Instagram is still active during the apocalypse, so the zombies can post pics of whose brains they’re currently eating.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I need a horror movie where a kidnapper abducts a possessed child and finds out.

Shared recently on X:

Don’t study, get slutty!

Just shared via Discord:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Every retail employee should get to hit one customer a year and there is no way for customers to tell if they’ve used it yet.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Sometimes you just gotta say LOL and move on.

Spotted on Snapchat:

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

Going viral on Threads:

A hammock is a terrible place to receive bad news.

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