Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Someone to hold you? You mean like a personal hugging device? 🤖🤗 Or maybe just a set of extra long arms for those hard-to-reach cuddle moments? 🦾🤗 Just imagine the possibilities! 😉"

companionship, hold, humor, invent, invention, loneliness, me, should, someone

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

0

2 months ago

achievement, brag, directions, humor, i, navigation, someone, success
Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

0

2 months ago

change, culture, drinking, humor, irony, matcha, men, used, war
The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

0

2 months ago

chemistry, electron, electrons, humor, joke, moron, neutron, neutrons, proton, protons, science, world
Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

0

2 months ago

dinner, downstairs, eat, enemies, enemies to lovers, family, family dinner, gay, good, humor, i, ID, just, lovers, man, only, parents, relationship, stereotype, wanted, woman, yell
What happened to the art of just liking one person?

0

2 months ago

affection, art, commitment, dating, just, liking, love, loyalty, person, relationship
One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

0

2 months ago

aging, change, cleaner, excited, excitement, fun, humor, minute, new, next, vacuum, vacuum cleaner, young, youth

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

70 shares on Snapchat this month:

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

81 shares on TikTok this month:

I support robot taxis. How else are robots supposed to get around?

26 shares on Slack this month:

A gender-neutral equivalent of ‘sugar daddy’ is glucose guardian.

97 shares on Instagram this month:

Victor Frankenstein being only 23 years old when he made the monster is crazy to me, he should have been at the club.

21 shares on YouTube this month:

You don’t become cooler with age, but you do care progressively less about being cool, which is the only true way of being cool. This is called the Geezer’s Paradox.

12 shares on Facebook this month:

Thinking you’re too smart to be manipulated is exactly how you get manipulated.

34 shares on Telegram this month:

Slowly I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

63 shares on Pinterest this month:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

I could never give up my dog, he knows too much.

72 shares on Slack this month:

Only in America can a kid wear $150 shoes, sip a $8 coffee, and post from a $1,200 phone about being oppressed and claiming capitalism has failed them.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Researchers have discovered that birthdays are healthy. People who have more grow older.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has shared:

Broke my work phone. I can’t talk on it anymore. I should have done this a long time ago.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m not moody; I’m just on shuffle.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

I need someone to convince me into or out of buying a jetski. I can’t keep living in this purgatory.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has bookmarked:

One day you’re young and carefree, and the next you have a favorite stove burner.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

No Botox. I need to furrow my brow when people say dumb things.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

One day you’re young and carefree and the next, you’re preheating the bathroom before you go in for a shower.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

If you watch soccer backwards, it’s about 11 sad and 11 happy men who nag each other until they get along eventually.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

“Left alone” would have been the right answer as a child to the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I’m having an orange, and the dogs keep looking at me like, “stop eating that ball, dude.”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Insane that you have to defend yourself at the end of the Ph. D.! Why are you attacking me? I’m so tired.

Spotted on Slack:

I can’t explain how it works, but one day, you just wake up and like sauerkraut.

Spotted on YouTube:

My bra isn’t just padded — it’s also filled with cookie and chip crumbs.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

Vaginally speaking, he seems nice.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

If you ever have a crush on someone and want it to end, listen to a podcast they are on.

Just shared via Telegram:

I hate when you leave your phone on the side, and it brings up that red evil clock.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Welcome to your 40s, you now don’t understand a single word anyone under 25 is saying.

Trending via Facebook:

My new pajamas have no pockets. I don’t want to hear your problems.

Trending via TikTok:

Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

They should invent someone who holds me.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

The world contains protons, neutrons, electrons, and morons.

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

One minute you’re young and fun, the next you’re excited about a new vacuum cleaner.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨