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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Do you enjoy addiction, anxiety, and urinating? Then coffee may be the beverage for you.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

If there is a God and He “loves” us, then explain snakes.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

Crashed my car reading a billboard that said, “Don’t text and drive.”

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

The person opposite me has a donut. I do not have a donut. That should be my donut. This person is now my arch nemesis.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

How can you not appreciate a drunk text? Someone is absolutely off their face and still thinking of you.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

My door camera alerts are all just me stepping outside to see how warm it is.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

Oasis didn’t just write good songs. They wrote the soundtrack for a whole generation.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

Аbsolutely crazy to thіnk that Leonardo DіCaprіo’s future gіrlfrіend іs currently nervous for her fіrst day of kіndergarten.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,967

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,967

17 minutes ago

3,439

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Facebook:

I’m officially at the age where I hate unnecessary noises and useless friends.

Just shared via Threads:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it’s a soap opera.

Making waves on Twitch:

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

Going viral on Telegram:

Sometimes I want to sleep, but my brain decides to do a little tap dance through every mistake I’ve ever made, instead.

Making waves on Facebook:

If you ever need me, I’m always just a couple missed calls and text messages away.

Just landed via WeChat:

Went to an antique show and people started bidding on me.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

I never judge a book by its cover. People, though, I can tell are evil by their stupid faces.

Freshly posted on Discord:

You give my middle finger an erection.

Shared recently on Discord:

The Midwest urge to have a drink on a patio as soon as it’s nice out.

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

5 months ago

This too shall pass, but what the hell?

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Commentary:
Ah, the eternal conundrum – waiting for things to pass while also questioning the cosmic absurdity of it all 🤷‍♂️ Remember, even the weirdest moments eventually become outlandish anecdotes for future laughs! 🌀 #RollWithTheCosmicPunches

hell, humor, irony, life, pass, perspective, struggle, too

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

805 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,967

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,967

17 minutes ago

3,441

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

I can handle most things in life, but hearing people chew isn’t one of them.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I don’t “make friends”. I get adopted by extroverts and they make me do things.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

My security system is just a bunch of my unpaid bills taped to my front door.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

No one buys my theory that red fire hydrants are filled with ketchup and yellow fire hydrants are filled with mustard.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

I’m not like the other girls. I’m a 37 year old man.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I’m bored, but not “read a book for fun” bored.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has shared:

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

I’m a private person except for when I’m publicly trauma dumping on social media.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

“You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

I don’t want to “act young”. I just can’t be as “grown up” as others my age.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

If at first you don’t succeed, it’s only attempted murder.

Broadcasted on X:

What must a pancake think when it’s being flipped? Doubtless something jolly.

Going viral on Discord:

There’s nothing that I hate more than a failed nap attempt.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

She’s a 10, but she says ‘Orwellian’ when it’s clearly ‘Kafkaesque”.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If there’s ever an alien invasion, I hope it doesn’t start while I’m asleep. I hate being woken up before my alarm.

Just landed via Telegram:

If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.

Going viral on Facebook:

Brushing your teeth at night is a hellish chore. Walking from bed to bathroom feels harder than working in the mines all day. I’m getting pissed just thinking about it.

Just landed via Facebook:

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Trending via Twitch:

Getting old would be so fun if you didn’t wake up each morning with neck pain that suggests you slept hanging upside down like a bat.

Spotted on WeChat:

Teens don’t know how good they have it with lyrics sites. We used to have to sing shit wrong for years until the truth destroyed us.

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