Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Super excited about a brand new week of self-sabotage.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

Someone from 🇸🇻 has shared:

It feels like a million o’clock right now.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

I started at the bottom, and it’s been downhill ever since.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Cause of death: Trying to draw eyebrows on the neighbor’s cat.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

My goal for this year is just to make sure the aliens know I’m on their side.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Unfortunately, I am not nonchalant, I will set myself on fire.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,370

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

Does anyone else feel like their brain has a hundred tabs open at once?

Making waves on Facebook:

Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

Spotted on Messenger:

Anyone know how to get an air guitar out of a vacuum?

Making waves on Snapchat:

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Making waves on Twitch:

You better pray to whatever god you serve that this email finds you before I do.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I was always told to eat all my food so that I’d grow to be big and strong. When exactly does the strong part kick in?

Broadcasted on Slack:

I put the hot in psychotic.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If it weren’t for the last minute, I’d never do anything.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

“Real Housewives” is a great oxymoron because nothing about them is real.

Shared recently on Slack:

I need a long hot meteor shower.

This year has gone by so quick. Christmas is basically tomorrow.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Time flies when you're having fun—or when you just blink! 🎅⏰🙃

celebration, Christmas, date, gone, holiday, quick, surprise, time, tomorrow, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

We’ve had far more storms since we started naming them. We’re giving them the attention they crave. Just call it needy wind.

0

2 months ago

attention, call, giving, humor, just, naming, needy, storm, storms, wind
Hey there, Delilah, we know you broke that dude’s heart.

0

2 months ago

broke, greeting, heart, heartbreak, humor, know, name, relationship
Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother, and we should respect her.

0

5 months ago

bad, bad habit, habit, habits, humor, laziness, mother, respect, should
After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

0

2 months ago

25, 30, age, humor, life, milestone, perspective
As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

0

3 weeks ago

dating, Funny, girlfriend, having, humor, irony, relationship, sounds, woman, women
Gonna close my bank account and keep all my money on me, like Sonic the Hedgehog.

0

6 months ago

account, bank, bank account, cash, character, close, finance, game, hedgehog, humor, keep, me, money, saving, sonic, Sonic the Hedgehog, video, video game character

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

80 shares on Discord this month:

I hate when someone on a magazine cover stares at me while I eat.

31 shares on Twitch this month:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

99 shares on Discord this month:

After a vacation, I usually return to work with a fresh, reenergized hatred for my job.

69 shares on Telegram this month:

I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.

73 shares on Messenger this month:

I think it’s extremely important, especially in the morning, to be quiet.

44 shares on Threads this month:

Reading Shakespeare for the first time is crazy because you go, “Oh, that’s where that comes from,” every other page.

47 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I don’t know why we traded horses for cars. Your car won’t stop in front of a river and be like, “no way dumbass, we aren’t going to make that.”

27 shares on Instagram this month:

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

33 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

23 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m really into writing short fiction, mainly to-do lists.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

I feel like a wildlife photographer when I spend hours trying to capture my teenager’s smile.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

Girl, you gotta try this healing potion. It’s called beer.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

No, you don’t understand. This is my special mistake. I keep making it because it is very dear to me, like an old friend.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Today I went for a walk with a girl, she noticed me, so we went for a run.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Asking him what his favorite dinosaur is on the first date to determine compatibility.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

I like that they put all that stuff outside for you to look at when you’re on a walk.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has shared:

Public urination isn’t a crime if you do it in your pants.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

Shoutout to everyone who works hard to support their dog’s extravagant lifestyle.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

I am so full of love and anger, like a lava lamp.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

My favorite 90s skill: Uninstalling my car stereo and hiding it in my glove box in under 15 seconds.

Just shared via Threads:

Me: Maybe it’s the weed talking but your apartment seems enormous. IKEA Manager: Sir.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

Shared recently on Threads:

Living up to your potential sounds exhausting.

Just shared via Instagram:

Normalize asking if this is an intervention whenever someone invites you over.

Going viral on X:

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Going bananas on Discord:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

Just landed via Twitch:

There’s no way you could go all the way through the desert on a horse with no name, you’d have named it by the end.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

This year has gone by so quick. Christmas is basically tomorrow.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

We’ve had far more storms since we started naming them. We’re giving them the attention they crave. Just call it needy wind.

Hey there, Delilah, we know you broke that dude’s heart.

Laziness is the mother of all bad habits, but ultimately she is a mother, and we should respect her.

After 25, you’re pretty much 30.

As funny as it sounds, the easiest way to get women is by having a girlfriend.

Gonna close my bank account and keep all my money on me, like Sonic the Hedgehog.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨