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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

Nothing gets my heart pumping like receiving an annoying newsletter.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Being loved right feels like telepathy and a little bit of witchcraft.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

If my TV’s so smart then why doesn’t it slap me when I turn on the news?

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Threw my back out due to overwhelming sensuality again.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

Being single is better than asking a man to act like a man.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has shared:

Sometimes people just need you to be genuine with them, and I personally have no problem pretending to do that.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

“It’s the most wonderful crime of the year!” I crooned running away with the pot of Santa’s donations.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

Naked and Afraid because there’s a spider in the shower with me.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I love being wrong, it’s just like being right except easier and I get to be stupid, which is my favorite thing.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,629

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WeChat:

Onion rings? I’m answering.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Seaweed is great for when you want to eat pure salt but wish it had the texture of slime.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The more water you drink, the more bathroom breaks, the less you work. Stay hydrated.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Saturdays are for doing absolutely everything or doing absolutely nothing, everybody knows that.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I love when women move on. It’s my favourite genre.

Making waves on WeChat:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so make sure you tell bad people they’re bad.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Girl math is avoiding shipping costs by buying more.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’d like to thank the municipal snow plow for recreating the wall from Game of Thrones at the end of my driveway.

Shared recently on Twitch:

People don’t realize how hard you ride for them until you park.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I wasn’t sure why the doctor prescribed LSD for my constipation, until I saw a dragon and shit myself.

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

2 months ago

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This is how I imagine curators feel every day: "Monet? Banger. Van Gogh? Total banger." 🎨😂

after, around, art, art critique, art museum, banger, casual, casual talk, critique, expression, humor, museum, museum visit, painting, saying, slang, talk, verbal, verbal expression, visit, walking

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60 shares on Reddit this month:

At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?

44 shares on X this month:

A girl, her bed, and TV series on a Friday evening is a true love story.

67 shares on Reddit this month:

That was a nice hour long Twitter scroll. Feel much worse as always. See you guys tomorrow.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

In 2007, if you wore a long-sleeve T-shirt under a regular T-shirt, it meant that you liked music.

57 shares on Telegram this month:

Aging isn’t even 1% as scary as whatever is going on with the people trying not to.

77 shares on WeChat this month:

Someone said I should think before I speak and I said “eww what a horrible way to live”

11 shares on Snapchat this month:

I wish I could invoice people for wasting my time.

19 shares on Threads this month:

Spotify Wrapped? Next year, maybe you should try to be in the top .05% of listeners to your girlfriend.

68 shares on Threads this month:

Look, ice cream has eggs in it, therefore it is a breakfast food.

30 shares on Facebook this month:

Hanging out with a couple and saying, “May this love never find me,” every time there’s a slight conflict.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has shared:

Movies in the 80s had me convinced that a main part of being a grown-up was staying late at the office and eating Chinese takeout.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

I like people who make me forget that I’m shy.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Imagine not sighing when you think about your life.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Anytime I switch deodorants, it’s like a sexy stranger is following me around all day.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Ghosting is actually a sign of great respect in my culture.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Seeing a BBL in real life is a reality-altering experience.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

Eating rice with my hands, but not in a political way. In a lazy, fat guy way.

Trending via WeChat:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

Shared recently on Threads:

Always be kind. You never know who has a pool.

Seen just now on X:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Just shared via YouTube:

First caveman to see fire: Well, this is a buncha bullshit that no one needs (stomps it out) and I predict that’s the last I’ll ever see of that.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

It’s Mother’s Day Eve so remember to leave out a bottle of wine for Mom when she comes down the chimney.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Women will brag about their intuition, and then date a DJ.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Adulthood is about being able to eat cookies for breakfast, but not doing it because you already ate all the cookies.

Shared recently on Discord:

I’ve never wrestled an angry alligator, but I have taken off a wet sports bra in the middle of summer. So, same thing.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.

“I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.” Ok, why are you helping the devil?

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Dear resealable chocolate bag, your confidence in my self-control was truly inspiring. And you were delicious.

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Walking around the art museum and verbally saying, “Banger,” after inspecting a painting.

Keep the laugh going 😂

I try to find the good in every situation. Wait, no – that was a typo. Food. I try to find the food in every situation.

If anyone needs me, I’ll be in a different realm.

“I’m just playing devil’s advocate here.” Ok, why are you helping the devil?

Opening a Star Wars pub called Bar Bar Binks.

Dear resealable chocolate bag, your confidence in my self-control was truly inspiring. And you were delicious.

The train announcer just said we should keep our personal belongings with us at all times but I’ve left most of mine at home.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨