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Commentary:
Looks like some women have a talent for consistency! 😂💸 Double whammy for the poor guy! Looks like he's in a lose-lose situation, no matter what 💔 #GoldDiggerAlert

call, dating, humor, i, me, money, much, poor, self-esteem, ugly, wealth, women

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70 shares on Messenger this month:

Whoever said, “Laughter is the best medicine,” clearly never tried Revenge.

36 shares on YouTube this month:

When I was a little kid, I used to think, “This little pig went to market,” meant it was going shopping!

23 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

99 shares on Messenger this month:

Do you think the washing machine and the dryer are actual friends or just work friends?

37 shares on Messenger this month:

Welcome to your 50s. You used to be a lot taller.

100 shares on YouTube this month:

My bank account is also in retrograde.

76 shares on TikTok this month:

People always tell me I’d be “late to my own funeral” like it’s a bad thing. They’d be lucky if I even showed up to that depressing shit.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

23 shares on WhatsApp this month:

As highly as it’s esteemed, the Mayo Clinic still sounds like the place sick sandwiches go to get better.

51 shares on Instagram this month:

Has anyone seen my invisibility cloak?

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has viewed:

If you love someone, let them sleep.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

My mom asked me where I’m taking her to eat on Mother’s Day. I told her we have food at home.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

It’s completely absurd that Silicon Valley is pushing AI on us before they figured out how to keep fries fresh for longer.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

One downside of marrying a doctor is you have to give up eating apples.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Eventually, kids get old enough to see which parent was the problem.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

I had to treat myself to a sweet goody today to distract my mind from the horrors of life.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has shared:

My favorite part of Spring is its rolls.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

Maybe her DMs haven’t been working for 2 months.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has viewed:

Before I agree to the new year, I wanna read the terms and conditions.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’ve asked so many people what LGBTQ stands for. So far no one has given me a straight answer.

Just shared via YouTube:

Men want to meet up too easily. What if I plan to sacrifice you?

Just shared via Pinterest:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Just shared via Instagram:

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Young witches boil every cauldron on high.

Making waves on Pinterest:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Just shared via Slack:

I want someone to look at me the way I look at a travel booking website.

Just shared via Slack:

When you tickle a man to death by accident, it is manslaughter.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I wish berries were the size of apples. Just imagine for a second.

Going viral on Reddit:

I like how people say “travel safely” like I’m the one flying the plane.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

Being a little freak is my love language.

It seems a little unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed who don’t want to go to bed.

If I were a mouse, I’d say things like “cheesed to meet you”.

One of my favorite parts of grocery shopping is when somebody else does it for me.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

Keep the laugh going 😂

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

Being a little freak is my love language.

It seems a little unfair that the people who want to go to bed have to put the people to bed who don’t want to go to bed.

If I were a mouse, I’d say things like “cheesed to meet you”.

One of my favorite parts of grocery shopping is when somebody else does it for me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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