Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who says parenting can't be fun and educational at the same time? 🤓🍸 Let's just hope the math problems don't start getting blurry after a few sips! 😂 #MathMomsGoneWild"

drink, great, help, homework, humor, kid, know, math, parenting, struggle, vodka

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

0

2 months ago

absolutely, day, doing, doing nothing, enough, hours, humor, laziness, me, nothing, procrastination, time
A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

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2 months ago

good, house, humor, illusion, know, living, magic, magician, mystery, never, secret, surprise, unexpected
Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

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2 months ago

food, food storage, fun, humor, kitchen, leftover, storage, store, throwaway, Tupperware
Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

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2 months ago

breathing, humor, interrupt, joke, rest, sleep, threat
My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

0

2 months ago

90, 90 years, advice, age, biscuit, grandmother, humor, life, life advice, live, longevity, nothing, shining, spite, year’s
Imagine falling in love with me then finding out I’m a slow walker.

0

2 months ago

dating, expectations, falling, finding, humor, imagine, irony, love, me, relationship, slow, slow walker, walker

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

45 shares on TikTok this month:

You really have to enjoy the way a man is acting in the beginning, because you will never meet that man again.

78 shares on YouTube this month:

I hate Valentine’s Day but I do enjoy infant archery.

34 shares on Discord this month:

Just realized John the Baptist and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name.

79 shares on TikTok this month:

Performative male is kinda just a rebrand of metrosexual, which is just a way to say a straight guy is a little bit faggy.

53 shares on YouTube this month:

It’s all fun and games until your jeans don’t fit any more.

96 shares on Facebook this month:

Filling animals with helium is kinda weird, but whatever floats your goat.

77 shares on TikTok this month:

Might start a YouTube channel “will it hurt if I drop it on my foot”.

62 shares on YouTube this month:

Mid-life crisis? No, no, mid-day crisis. Something happens every day.

78 shares on Facebook this month:

Things I hate about group work: The group.

59 shares on Snapchat this month:

People will be like “Nobody cares about your Spotify Wrapped,” and then post a picture of their baby.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has viewed:

I say “long story short” and then tell the story with bonus features.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Me to cat: quit looking at me like I’m an ingredient.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Every girl’s personal hell is being too excited about their birthday and it ends up being the worst day ever.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

That moment your alarm clock goes off in the morning and you don’t know whether to get dressed or fake an illness.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

Desperately searching the dating app settings for an option to turn down the difficulty level.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has viewed:

Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

We went out on a boat to see whales and the crew encouraged us to clap and cheer for the whales and boo at the regular fish.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has bookmarked:

I admire how, when babies don’t want to hold something anymore, they just drop it.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Instagram:

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

Just landed via Messenger:

Work can be tiring at times, and you might feel like quitting. But remember those plane tickets.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I just read a thing that said I should compliment myself on my decisions, regardless of the outcome. No thanks, I’m not the government.

Just landed via TikTok:

I want to run through your dreams and settle in your nightmares.

Trending via Twitch:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so eat that cake today.

Seen just now on Discord:

Do you ever restart the dryer because you don’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

Just landed via Snapchat:

Have you ever “accidentally” eaten a family sized bag of chips?

Going viral on Reddit:

I get jealous when I find someone playing a song I thought only I knew.

Spotted on Messenger:

“Machines will soon be as smart as people.” Ok, but which people?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You know what goes great with helping your kid with math homework? Vodka!

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to do absolutely nothing.

A really good magician could be living in your house and you would never know.

Tupperware is a fun way to store your leftovers until you throw them away.

Interrupt my sleep and I’ll interrupt your breathing.

My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

Imagine falling in love with me then finding out I’m a slow walker.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨