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Living in a city where seagulls are the fashionably exclusive bird poop connoisseurs – a true sign of elite urban living! 💁‍♂️🏙️ Who needs mundane pigeon droppings when you can boast a splash of seaside sophistication? Embrace the unexpected blessings from above, darling! 💩🕊️ #CityLivingElevated

anecdote, city, funny observation, great, humor, life, live, nature, observation, pigeon, seagull, urban, urban life, wildlife

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

1 month ago
anxiety, attraction, attractive, confidence, dating, flirting, hoping, humor, i, looking, me, multiple, self-deprecating, shy, social, social anxiety, someone, times, version
The grass isn’t really greener over there; that’s just a filter.

1 month ago
filter, grass, greener, humor, illusion, just, over, perception, perspective, reality, sarcasm
My superpower is embarrassing myself.

1 month ago
awkwardness, embarrassing, humor, myself, personality, self-deprecation, superpower
Shoutout to everyone who remembers their childhood landline number but can’t recall the password they made yesterday. You’re my people.

17 hours ago
childhood, everyone, forgetfulness, humor, landline, memory, nostalgia, number, password, people, phone, phone number, recall, shoutout, technology, yesterday
He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

2 weeks ago
asking, Christmas, Christmas light, decoration, feet, holiday, holiday preparation, light, lights, preparation, realize, relationship, Saturday, surprise, task, untangling
I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

1 month ago
afraid, carry, fear, humor, i, sleeping, someone, steal, wallet, work

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

You just can’t live a full life on an empty stomach.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Airports are so funny. Like, “Oh, you’re flying across the country? Would you like to hang out in a mall first?”

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For those who don’t want Alexa listening in on your conversations, they’re making a male version that doesn’t listen to anything.

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Every laptop should have a “cat” button that disables the keyboard so they can nap.

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There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

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Why can’t my fat leave me like everything else does?

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Pouring rain, football on TV, empty house; the stuff dreams are made of.

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Just shared via YouTube:

I do not use AI, I use Reddit commenters’ opinions as fact because they are right.

Making waves on Pinterest:

Women pretending not to see men staring at them is an essential survival skill.

Going viral on X:

Golf would be more exciting to watch if they played naked.

Making waves on Instagram:

The best thing capitalism has done is put a little window on pasta boxes so the noodles can look out at the world.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Seen just now on WeChat:

You ever have your knees crack so good that you expect them to glow in the dark. Yeah, me too.

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You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

The grass isn’t really greener over there; that’s just a filter.

My superpower is embarrassing myself.

Shoutout to everyone who remembers their childhood landline number but can’t recall the password they made yesterday. You’re my people.

He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

I should’ve been a crow. They get to fly around looking goth as hell and seeking retribution. Instead, I have to go to an office and work on my ‘people skills.’

You get what you pay for. Unless the delivery man leaves it on your doorstep. Then the fastest person on your street gets what you paid for.

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trying to work outside on a laptop is like sunbathing on a melting ice cube.

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

Just pulled a Werther’s Original out of my pocket, like I’m 87 years old.

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Apparently, “I just don’t want to” is not a valid reason when your boss asks you why you’re not coming in today.

When people talk about enriching their lives, I assume they’ve found a way to add more cheese.

Lowkey wanna fall in love, but Monday to Friday is work, Saturday is laundry, Sunday is mental prep for Monday. The butterflies in my stomach are actually decomposing.

I made up all these romantic scenarios in my brain and you’re not following the script.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I have consumed so much potato salad the last couple of days, I’m sweating mayo.

Self-care is putting your face on a very soft cat.

I have found that there is usually a lot of day left at the end of my patience.

Losing jewelry is a different type of hurt.

I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode.

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You live in a great city when you get pooped on by a seagull instead of a pigeon.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My version of flirting is looking at someone I find attractive multiple times and hoping they’re braver than me.

The grass isn’t really greener over there; that’s just a filter.

My superpower is embarrassing myself.

Shoutout to everyone who remembers their childhood landline number but can’t recall the password they made yesterday. You’re my people.

He doesn’t realize it yet, but this Saturday, I’ll be asking him to untangle 400 feet of Christmas lights.

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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