Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

A lot of men actually do forgive cheating, as long as their homies don’t know.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Nothing like a grandfather clock to remind you every hour that you’re still awake.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

When you meet twins, demand to speak with the one in charge.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

I’m surprised some of you are allowed out of your house on your own.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

I should’ve existed as a tree.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

One of the kids said, “Camping looks fun,” so tonight we’re watching The Revenant.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

I suppose the supreme discipline for ninjas is sneaking up with flip flops.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

They call it a coffin because they’re finally coughing up that inheritance.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

531 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,124

Funny Quotes Topics

17,272

Funny Quotes Images

15,124

Updated

Dec 27, 2025

Users Online

3,958

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

The world would be a better place if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

Making waves on X:

Riding a bike is an insane concept. You just sit and run at the same time.

Trending via Reddit:

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

Spotted on X:

When you have finished reading this funny quote, you will be a little closer to death than before.

Live now on Pinterest:

I haven’t had sex in so long, I forgot how to moan, what if I mess up and bark?

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Making eye contact with strangers on the sidewalk and saying “it’s crazy that they just let me walk around, haha”.

Trending via Instagram:

I’ve just learned terrible news. My department at work is planning a team-building retreat. Thank you for your thoughts during this difficult time.

Spotted on Slack:

Monday holds the record for being the worst day of the week.

Going bananas on Threads:

A piece of chocolate contains just enough energy to take another one.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Whenever I lose my faith in justice, I look at the high school beauties from back then today. Then I’m fine again.

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Haha, now that's what I call a strong password! 💀🔒😂

dark, dark humor, frustration, health, humor, just, live, mental, mental health, password, resilience, sarcasm, too, wait

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

0

2 months ago

animal, coming, communication, dog, growl, humor, i, me, try, understand, understanding, where
If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

0

2 months ago

attempt, bad, embarrassing, embarrassment, failure, humor, motivation, success
Me: Hello, darkness, my old friend. Darkness: I have a boyfriend.

0

1 month ago

boyfriend, conversation, darkness, friend, friendship, hello, humor, i, joke, me, old, rejection, relationship
I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

0

2 months ago

beautiful, benefit, boat, friend, friends, friendship, fun, home, homes, i, leisure, looking, luxury, mean, pool, pools, summer, vacation, vacation home
I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

0

2 months ago

age, aging, aging process, avocado, comparison, feel, fine, food, hoping, humor, i, process, self-deprecation, sort, wine
They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

0

2 months ago

charge, expenses, eyes, grocery, humor, money, observation, open, paper, poop, reality, toilet, toilet paper, turn

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

47 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

33 shares on WhatsApp this month:

What part of “hiii” do you not get? I’m in love with you.

98 shares on Facebook this month:

God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”

64 shares on Threads this month:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

30 shares on Threads this month:

I just saw someone on TikTok say that the reason the world didn’t end in 2012 is because Psy turned the Honmoon gold with Gangnam Style.

30 shares on Pinterest this month:

Me passing someone: you slow mule! Me being passed: okay, speed racer!

97 shares on Twitch this month:

I am in favor of equal pay for men on OnlyFans.

64 shares on X this month:

There is a grave concern that this post will produce zero likes.

35 shares on Slack this month:

Today, I want to talk about underperforming continents. Antarctica, explain yourself.

57 shares on WeChat this month:

I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

What doesn’t kill you makes you weird at intimacy.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Moving houses/apartments gotta be top 3 worst human experiences.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

One minute you’re young and fun, and the next, you’re turning down the stereo in your car to see better.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

I feel like I’m in jail when I’m around unfunny people for too long.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I read somewhere that playing white noise helps you sleep better, but I didn’t find country music helpful at all.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Always stay crazy. Otherwise you’ll go crazy.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has shared:

My morning routine is basically just me convincing myself not to go back to bed.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has downloaded:

Old age is like a glorious, extended long weekend, but you always know Monday’s coming.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has shared:

There should be a way to take back a compliment bestowed upon a person who doesn’t acknowledge it well.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

We should all go into advertising and fix what’s going on with commercials. They need our help.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

Grandmas be like: Imma stay for a few days and reset your children back to factory settings.

Breaking via Threads:

I’m proud of myself because, despite having so many expenses, I still manage to add more.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I’m never early… unless we’re talking about the airport.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I feel so bad when I overtake an old person on the sidewalk. Like, man, I really didn’t mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.

Just shared via Slack:

May he drop his phone on his face while he’s texting other girls.

Trending via TikTok:

Money talks, and also waves goodbye.

Making waves on TikTok:

Perks of being ugly: phone battery lasts longer.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

If pigeons and chickens made a tribe, would they be called the coo clucks clan?

Just landed via Messenger:

The problem with relationships these days is you don’t know if you’re the one being cheated on, or cheated with.

Breaking via Snapchat:

I came, I saw, I took a selfie as proof that I came and saw.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

“Your password is too weak.” Just wait until you see my will to live.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where they’re coming from.

If at first you don’t succeed, that’s so embarrassing. Why are you so bad at this?

Me: Hello, darkness, my old friend. Darkness: I have a boyfriend.

I’m looking for friends with benefits. And by that I mean friends who have pools, boats and beautiful vacation homes.

I was hoping to age like a fine wine, but I sort of feel more like an avocado.

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨